Silent Promises
by anachit08
Summary: Dan shocked all of New York by revealing his identity as Gossip Girl, but where does this leave him and Serena? Will they rekindle their old flames or will this be the end?
1. Morning Coffee XOXO

**Morning Coffee XOXO**

 **/this story takes place during the last episode 6X10 (New York, I love you XOXO), before the 5 year time skip. /**

* * *

"To Chuck and Blair!" the conclusion of Nate's best man speech was met with raised glasses and warm smiles.

The wedding reception might have been the only occasion in which Blair Waldorf- excuse me, Blair Bass had not invited more than half of Upper East Side. The event in its entirety was short, festive and enjoyed by friends and family. Of course Blair was less than ecstatic about Georgina and Dan dulling her celebration, despite having forgiven Dan for spending seven years writing bullshit about her.

"Thank you everyone for coming. It was lovely to have you." Blair greeted in her usual artificially sweet tone, but today one might suspect, there was a genuine glee in her voice. Even Chuck's smirk had bloomed, and for once it looked as if he truly was smiling.

"I'm so happy for them." Serena squeaked and smiled at the happy couple.

"Yeah. I have never seen a better evil scheming duo than those two." Dan remarked, earning a short laugh from Nate.

"Ah. Well this was nice." Nate sighed. "Tomorrow is going to be a big day." Glancing at Dan, he added. "For the both of us."

"Yeah. Yeah it is." Dan looked around the room, and then finally stopping to meet Serena's deep blues. "There's a lot to be done." he continued, without breaking eye contact.

The three stood in silence for a tensed coupled of seconds. Both Nate and Serena were trying hard to repress their urge to badger Dan with questions and Dan was well aware of it. In fact almost everyone in the room was dying to interrogate Dan, but dared not to, for it would be rude to the happy couple. That and, no one wanted to face the wrath of Blair Waldorf-Bass. Just the new name gave most goosebumps.

By the time Lily left, almost all the guests had exited.

"Ugh, I'm exhausted." Blair finally announced.

"Well" Chuck smirked "We can't have that now, can we?"

"I think we all should leave before we hear the end of the that sentence." Dan whispered, causing Serena to laugh like a four year old. And for the first time Dan was startled, there was a nostalgic throb in his heart. It had been years since he had heard her laugh in her carefree and childish manner. He hadn't realized how much he had missed it.

"Ahem" Nate interrupted Dan's subtle admiration of Serena. "I think we should all give these two some time alone." he was answered with nods of agreement.

"Congratulations! I'm so happy for you two." Serena was the last to wish them.

"Thanks S." Blair pulled Serena into an embrace. Even Chuck gave her a small yet kind hug. Serena hadn't realized just how close her and Chuck had grown in just matter of three years. Chuck, in his own twisted way had become a brother to her.

Serena made her way out of the building, smiling to herself. Today was overwhelming, but it was one of the best days she had in a while. They were all back on friendly terms and Blair and Chuck finally tied the knot. She was glad she made the decision to stay. Maybe UES really was where she belonged.

Outside, waiting for her was a curly haired guy in a black jacket and a soft smile.

"Dan?" she smiled. "What are you still doing here?"

"We both are headed to the same place. I thought I might as well wait, you know." He shrugged with one shoulder. Then closing in on the distance between them, he continued "Besides I figured we had a lot to talk about."

"Yeah." Serena nodded.

Dan had his hand held out, waiting for Serena to take it. As she placed her hand in his, warmth flooded through her. It was a small gesture, but it meant so much more. It reminder her of when they first started dating. A ping of pain shot through her chest, reminding her of what she had and what she had lost.

"All those things about Jenny..."

"She wanted them on Gossip Girl. You are nothing untill you're talked about, right?"

"Even the thing about losing her virginity to Chuck?"

"Yup." Dan nodded.

"And how did you know about what happened between me and Chuck that night at the hotel? How did you even know how to find me?"

"Jenny told me where you were, and when I got there I saw you rushing out. Chuck was right behind you. It didn't take a genius to figure out."

"And the thing about Blair cheating?"

"That was all Chuck."

"Oh my God." Serena breathed out. They spend the whole riding talking; talking about everything except what they should have been talking about. A lot had happened in the spam of five years. A lot had happened today. And in all honesty, both of them were scared to scratch the surface of the ugly truth that lay before them. It had been so long since things were good between them, neither of them wanted to jinx it. But deep down both of them knew that this was just a false sense of security. There was something uneasy hidden in the playful atmosphere and it would peak it's ugly head eventually. It was just like the summer break four years ago.

"I still can't believe it." Serena looked at Dan. Her smile reaching her eyes. Dan couldn't help smiling back. His smile sobered as he took in the details of her face in the moonlight entering through the window. It made her golden hair shimmer and her eyes just a shade darker.

Serena was quick to notice the tension in the air, and the slightest moment of Dan's jaw. He leaned forward, careful not to invade her space. Her eyes closed automatically in response. A light jolt had Serena fluttering her eyes open. Dan hadn't moved but the tension had dropped a bit.

"This is us." She said softly.

"Yeah."

The elevator dinged, as they reached the fifth floor.

Standing in the corridor, in front of their parallel apartments, both Dan and Serena stood in silence. Neither sure of what to do.

The time they spent together today was too little. Neither was willing to let go. They could put everything behind them and give into their feelings but too much had happened. Too much to put behind. Ben, Blair, the sex tape, the exposés, all of it, fell like a chasm between them.

Finally it was Serena who made the move. Planting a kiss on Dan's cheek, she gave him a smile.

"Goodnight Dan."

Smiling back, Dan have her an awkward wave; a recreation of the one he gave her on their first date. This made Serena laugh heartily.

* * *

Sleep wouldn't come to Dan. He did all he could to get Serena back, so why was he still listless about it? Something within him was convinced he hadn't done enough.

He tried to remind himself he wasn't that seventeen year old boy any more, that he was an adult. But listening to Serena's kiddish laugh, he forgot all about it. It was like he was a high schooler again, enamoured by Serena van der Woodsen.

Things weren't any different across the hall. Serena spent the night tossing and turning. It was true that they had a lot to work through, but something about this just felt right.

Were they both ready to risk their hearts again? Everytime they tired, they were left heartbroken, struggling to recover.

 _'I've made mistakes, massive, heartbreaking mistakes. But I have never stopped loving you.'_

Sleep finally came to Serena in the morning. Snuggling into her comforter, she dozed lightly, only to be woken up by the doorbell. Groggily she staggered out of bed and peeped through the keyhole. She could clearly make out a head full of dark curls.

"Dan?" she opened the door. Outside her door stood Dan, two, to-go cups of coffee in hand. "What are you doing here?"

"We didn't really get a chance to talk last night. So I thought maybe we could go for a walk. Get a chance to talk."

Serena couldn't help but smile. "Then, let me slip into something less comfortable."

"Sure. Want me to talk to you while you change too?" Dan smiled.

 **/Author's Note: Hi, this was my first story, admittedly not the finest but I hope you like it. I'm open to criticism, so feel free to leave me a review. Thanks for dropping by!/**


	2. Storms and Strawberries XOXO

**Storms and Strawberries XoXo**

 **/A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed the story, you guys are wonderful. I'm glad you guys liked the first chapter. I'll try to be consistent with the story. /**

It was early morning and the New York air was cool, chilling even, but neither Serena nor Dan seemed to mind it.

So far they had wasted their time in silly banter. It was comfortable, familiar. It was clear neither of them wanted to break out of the bubble.

"Serena." Dan called softly.

His voice always had a magnetic quality to it. Serena always responded to it instantly.

"I know." she said, the softness in her voice matching his.

"I know a lot has happened." Dan admitted. "Steve, Blair, the story." he stopped, unsure of where he was going with this.

"And we've both been hurt at some point." Serena finished for him. "Dan, I really am sorry about Blair."

"Me too." Dan added softly. He hadn't realized that he had closed the gap between them as he said it. He tucked a blonde curl behind her ear and brushed her cheek. It was just so natural for him. "I never should have lost sight of who I wanted to be with. Now that everything is over, I regret every minute of it. Blair and I? We're... We're just so wrong for each other."

"She belongs with Chuck." Serena smiled.

"And I belong with you." Dan whispered. He wasn't sure about a lot of things. That's how it always was with Serena. You can never know. But he was dead sure of this. He meant it when he said it to Bart, and he meant it now.

The words made Serena melt a little. She leaned her head on his hand that was stroking her face. Biting her lip, she searched his brown eyes, but she didn't need to. She knew he meant it.

"And you were right. Upper East Side is where I belong. I belong _here_ , with mom and Blair and Chuck and Nate and _you_." she said the last word with such tenderness Dan couldn't help but touch her forehead with his.

He couldn't help himself any longer. Using his free hand, he gently grabbed her waist and pulled her closer. One of her hands rested delicately on his shoulder and the other was buried in his wild curls. Dan sighed a little. He missed this. Her hand playing with his curls. It had become habitual to the point where she would play with his hair without even noticing it.

"You don't know how much I have missed this, how much I've missed _you_." Dan whispered, brushing his lips against hers. Her mouth parted almost instantly. It was just one of those slow kisses. Dan wanted to savour every moment of it. It wasn't the hurried or rushed. Just sweet and slow.

"The story about you in Vanity Fare" Dan said as they broke the kiss. "It wasn't the version I had initially written. The first one was... Well um" he pulled slightly away, pulling out an envelope from the inside of his jacket pocket.

"It was this." Serena gingerly plucked it out of his hand. Dan motioned her to a nearby bench. But he made sure to dust off the snow and dust before Serena sat down, making her giggle.

Dan looked at her the entire time she was reading it. It wasn't to make out her expressions, it was simply because he felt that he didn't get a chance to look at her properly. He never did really. He would have spent days studying the details of her features if she had let him.

"Dan" Serena stretched out his name, making Dan snap out of his awe-stuck phase. "This... This is so sweet. Why..."

"Why didn't I publish this one? Serena with you it had always been _your_ world and _my_ world. We could never just co- exist. To you I was just a lost cause from Brooklyn trying to survive in a rich man's world."

"No, Dan I never though of you that way." Serena tried to justify.

"No, Serena. Whether you noticed or not, that's how it always was. I had to make you respect me. Make you see me as an equal."

"I did. "

"No you didn't. And that was the problem. You couldn't even acknowledge it. I knew after reading it you would hate me. I prayed that you wouldn't but you did. It was better to have you hate me than not respect me. That was our problem all along. We would never work until you recognized me as an equal."

Dan didn't notice the hurt creep up on Serena's face as he rambled on.

"So." she cut him off. "You were so fixated on making me respect you that you humiliated me in front of everyone I know?! Did you not once think about how I would feel? Hearing those things from the guy I love?" she tried to mask the hysteria but failed to do so.

"Serena." Dan whispered softly. "I never meant to hurt you."

Serena only shook her head as she fought back the tears.

"Serena." this time it was more of a plea. A plea to hear him out.

"Dan..." she chocked. "I need time..." and with that Serena ran out. Dan only made it half way when he gave up _. I need to give her time,_ he realized. But he couldn't keep the pain from showing.

* * *

The fight had been yesterday, and Dan couldn't take it anymore. He spent majority of his day pacing around his apartment, to no avail.

Finally he decided he was going to go see her.

Dan entered his apartment building at around ten in the morning, with a box of chocolate covered strawberries in hand.

He stopped short when he saw a familiar figure entering after him.

The man had his shirt tucked into his suit pants and a nonchalant smirk that was hard to forget.

In came Carter Baizen, his smug and carefree attitude trailing behind him. He stopped to smile at the dark haired man staring at him.

"Dan Humphrey, was it?"

Dan gave a sarcastic scoff. "Carter Baizen. To what do I owe this pleasure?"

"Oh I'm not here for you. But you wouldn't happen to know where Serena is, do you?" Carter smirked.

Something within Dan wanted to punch the guy. He didn't know what business Carter had with Serena but he didn't want him anywhere near her.

"Nevermind. I'll just directly talk to her." Carter advanced towards the elevator.

"I don't know what you want with her, but it's better you stay away from her." Dan squared his shoulder, jaw tense.

"And who are you to tell me what to do? Last time I checked, you weren't her boyfriend." the comment stung more than Dan cared to admit.

Dan bit back any comment and chose instead to grace Carter with a glare.

"All talk and no bite." Carter chuckled. "See you later... _gossip girl."_


	3. Familiar Faces XOXO

**Familiar Faces XOXO**

 **/A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed and continued to read the story. The main purpose of the fanfic is to give Dan and Serena a better ending. I felt like the show rushed it. Serena just let go of everything Dan did so easily./**

* * *

When the doorbell sounded Serena expected it to be Dan. Some part of her even hoped it was Dan. You could imagine her surprise when she opened the door to a stone grey set of eyes instead of brown ones.

"Carter?"

"Hey there beautiful." Carter's smug smile and endearing gaze hadn't changed one bit, but something about him seemed different. It wasn't his attire or attitude, it was something in the way he looked at her- hopeful and gentle.

"What are you doing here?" She asked, not bothering about how he even got in the building.

Serena hadn't moved a muscle but Carter took the unuttered invitation to let himself in.

"I'm here to see you." He said it as if it was obvious.

"Yeah but why?"

"That's not exactly a nice thing to say." Serena didn't bother replying, instead she crossed her arms and cocked an eyebrow.

"Look, Serena. I know I hurt you when I left." Serena gave a short, hollow laugh.

"I seem to be hearing that a lot lately."

"I mean it. I told you I was going to reform myself and I have done just that." He was standing in front of her, staring calmly into her navy blue eyes. "And you were the first person I wanted to see after everything settled. I couldn't care less about proving it to my family or the likes of people like Chuck. I wanted to show someone who would understand."

Serena _did_ understand. She knew what it was like to pick yourself up from the pits and walk out as a whole new person. She also knew how skeptical people were about it and how they judged you for your past rather than your present. She did understand.

Her hostile look softened. "Carter. I'm happy for you."

Carter broke into a full smile, something she rarely saw him do.

"You were also the first person I wanted to celebrate with. What do you say about going out for some drinks tonight?"

Serena stepped back. She was at a loss of words. Carter's invitation was harmless. He hadn't explicitly asked her out and it wasn't as if her and Dan were dating. And at the moment, it occured to Serena, they were far from it. But something about saying yes felt like betraying Dan.

 _Stop over-thinking. It's just a couple of drinks_. She reminded herself.

But she couldn't bring herself to say yes. "Um... I'll have to check my schedule for today."

Carter was never one to take bullshit. "Is this because of Humphrey?" He asked bluntly.

"N-no." She stammered. "It's just that I had this thing. You know what? Sure. Let's go."

Carter's characteristic smirk was back. "Great. See you at seven."

After Carter left, Serena let out a defeated breath. Why was she feeling so helpless? She desperately wanted someone to talk to but Blair and Chuck were on their honeymoon and she wasn't sure if she should go to Nate, given his heated history with Carter.

The doorbell rang again. Serena let out a frustrated sigh.

"Yes?" she called.

"Hungry?" A familiar voice called. Just half an hour ago, Serena was dying to hear his voice but at this very second she wanted to be as far away from it as she could.

"Not really Dan."

"I want to talk about yesterday." Serena hesitated for a moment and then let Dan in.

Dan set the box of chocolate covered strawberries on the coffee table and scratched the back of his head. "But I have a meeting with my publisher right now. Can we talk tonight?" Dan was looking at her with so much anticipation, that she didn't want to let him down.

"Dan. I'm sorry I can't. I have a prior commitment."

Dan didn't want to butt-in Serena's personal life but there was a part of him that was scared that she was going to be spending the night with Baizen.

"That's okay. We'll work something out later then." He tried to keep the skeptic part of himself at bay.

"Just out of curiosity." Dan stopped at the door. "What was the prior commitment?"

Serena didn't know why she didn't want Dan to know, but she just didn't. She should have been straight with him but instead she told him "I have to meet mom for dinner. I promised her last week."

"Oh. Say hi to Lily for me then." Dan nodded as he left the doorway and made his way to his own apartment.

* * *

Dan was desperately trying to put his mind at ease.

 _She's having dinner with Lily. Stop over analyzing it!_

But the way Serena was looking at him made him believe otherwise. Something seemed off.

 _I bet it has something to do with Carter._

Dan was so lost in thought that he didn't even realize he was centimeters away from bumping into someone.

The person avoided the collision with feline grace. She was dressed in white with her light blonde hair tucked in a bun. She looked exactly like her namesake- Lily van der Woodsen.

"Oh Dan! I forgot you lived here too."

"Hi Lily." he gave her a curt smile. "You.. Ah... You here to see Serena?" Dan didn't mean to pry but he couldn't help himself.

"Yeah." The words brought with them a sense of relief.

"She forgot some of her things at my place." Lily continued. "I've just been so busy lately, I thought I might drop them off."

"Drop them off? Aren't you two having dinner?"

"Dinner?" Lily asked incredulously.

"Serena mentioned it."

"Funny. We never discussed dinner plans."

"Yeah funny." muttered almost to himself.


	4. The Rift XOXO

**The Rift XOXO**

 **/A/N: As always thanks for reading and reviewing. A special thanks to Lia, because I can't directly reply to you. Thanks for being so supportive./**

* * *

Dan's meeting with Lily had been brief but it had been enough to put things into perspective, or so Dan thought. He wasn't pleased with what he had pieced together and wanted to believe otherwise but UES had taught him not to be so delusional.

Things were gradually falling into place but that all went to hell in the first hour Carter had been in vicinity.

He put all his suspicions aside. He had work to take care of. Deborah was already waiting for him at the restaurant when Dan arrived.

"Alright so about your next piece..." She cut directly to the subject at hand. Dan was happy to be engrossed in work and not thinking about Serena for once.

* * *

"What are we doing here? I thought you wanted to go out for drinks?" Serena asked; surprised but not upset.

"Well that was the plan at first, but I thought dinner would be more festive."

Serena had a horrible premonition that Carter had more than just platonic intentions behind this change of plans. Despite this she smiled at him. It was nice getting to know the new him. He was finally in good terms with his family and had taken over his father's business. He was handling mainly the overseas shipment but it had bloomed under his leadership. Who knew a good con-man could make a good businessman?

Of courses he hustled his way out of several situations. But that was fundamental to his character.

* * *

The meeting with Deborah went on till eight. Everything was in order. The deadline for the first draft of his new book had come. He had already begun work on it but the time frame still felt short. With the success of his previous books the demand for a new piece was high. Of course there was the movie too. He would soon be busy with that as well.

He had been avoiding all interviews about his latest piece in The Spectator, having promised Nate that he would be the one to conduct the interview. The year seemed to be happening for Dan, in every aspect except the love department it seemed.

Deborah left as swiftly as she had come, punctual as ever. As Dan was exiting the place his gaze fell on a face Dan had committed to memory.

It wouldn't take a genius to figure out what had Dan's blood boiling- Serena and Carter enjoying dinner. His jaw tensed and his gaze darkened. He should have done the more sensible thing and left. If she wanted throw herself at Carter who was he to say anything?

Dan had been a witness of this too many times. Seeing Serena with another man while he was still in love with her. He had reached his saturation point. Uncharacteristically Dan walked up to an astonished Serena and asked in almost a deadly whisper,

"Since when is Carter your mother?"

Serena opened her mouth but Dan stopped her. "Oh wait, let me guess. You can explain?" Dan looked at her challengingly.

"Why are you getting so worked up? As far as Serena is concerned, who she has dinner with is none of your business." Carter interjected.

"Carter." Serena stopped him from saying anything more. "Dan, can you not make a scene? I'll tell you when we get home."

Serena wanted to explain. Justify the fact that she wasn't betraying his trust but then why should she? They weren't dating. And although she was the one who lied to him, he had no right to show up on her dinner and cause drama.

Dan didn't reply. He just left but not before giving her a hostile stare.

It hadn't even been twenty minutes after Dan had left that Serena insisted that they go back.

 _Why is it always Humphrey?_ Carter wondered.

He could have made her stay but he saw no point in doing it. Her focus had shifted to Dan.

 _Another night ruined thanks to Humphrey._

* * *

Dan didn't go back to his apartment; instead he opted for the loft. He was too angry to deal with Serena. He could understand that she was mad at him but going behind his back and lying to him about Carter was pushing the limit.

"Dan?" Rufus was surprised to see his son enter unannounced.

"I needed to clear my head." Dan slouched down on the couch next to his dad and picked up a can of beer from the six pack lying on the coffee table.

"Girl trouble?" Asked Rufus. His dad somehow always knew what was wrong.

" _Serena_ trouble." Dan corrected.

Even Rufus didn't know what to tell Dan. He had had his own share of van der Woodsen drama.

Dan recalled his conversation with Bart. There was a difference between him and his father. His dad could only earn Lily's affection but never her respect. An old forgotten rock star and a socialite could never work, they weren't lead singer and groupie anymore. But gaining Serena's respect hadn't gotten Dan anywhere either. They were back to square one. Maybe they could never work, and maybe it didn't have anything to do with social status and interests. Maybe they just weren't compatible.

But the easy pace they fell into yesterday morning and the night before would prove the contrary. Dan had never felt more comfortable with anyone, not even Vanessa.

He had promised himself that he would give things with Serena another shot and he wouldn't be fulfilling his promise by giving up so easily.

His first though was to call Chuck or Blair but he didn't want to disturb them, so he went to Nate instead.

 _Hey Nate._

 _I need your help with a little personal matter._

Nate's reply was quick.

 _Yeah?_

 _It's about Carter Baizen._

Within minutes Dan received a call from Nate.

" _Carter Baizen is bad news. What happened?"_

 _"Well."_ Dan tried to phrase it as casually as possible. " _He's having dinner with Serena."_

 _"That isn't good at all."_

* * *

Serena tried Dan's doorbell thrice before giving up. She tried calling too but his line was busy. Angry, she just went back home. She didn't understand how he could be this upset over something so little? She was going to explain it to him, the least he could do was bother to listen.

 _How did the chat with Humphery go?_ The text was from Carter.

 _I can't reach him._ She admitted.

 _Well Humphery be damned._

When her phone rang she expected it to be Carter but it was a certain brunette calling from Spain.

"Hi." Blair's voice was chirpy.

"Hey B, how's the honeymoon?"

"Everything I hoped it's be."

"Now that's an achievement, pleasing Blair Woldrof-Bass. Well done Chuck." Serena held up a thumps up in front of the screen.

The conversation ranged from Chuck and Blair's trip around Europe and everything in between. They were going to hit Australia next and would be back in New York in the two weeks. Chuck even made a guest appearance during the face-time. Serena couldn't help but notice that there was something Blair wasn't telling her. As her best friend Serena desperately wanted to know but she knew that if she forced Blair, drama would ensue. Serena wanted to spare her best friend and bother from it.

"So." Blair smirked. "Where does this leave you and Humphery?" Serena honestly didn't have an answer.

"I don't know." She admitted.

"How can you not know? You were ogling each other at the reception, what changed?" _Dan did._

 _"_ We got into a fight of sorts. And I guess Carter's presence doesn't help the situation."

"Carter? Serena! You know what happened the last time!" There it was. This is what Carter was talking about. Everybody was too fixated on his past actions to notice how much effort he was putting into redeeming himself. It had been same for Serena when she had returned from boarding school. Everyone expected the worst form her.

 _I wasn't wrong to believe in you. I still do._ Dan's words ran though her mind in a continuous loop. He had believed the best in her when no one else did, not even her own mother. Oh why did he have to go and throw it all away with that expose? It was so hard to trust him now. What he wrote might have been true, but it stung coming from _him._ She loved him, always had, always will. But she can't erase the hurt and agony he had caused her. It would take time for her to start trusting again.

Why is it that all the men in her life had to leave her heartbroken and untrusting? Her dad, Nate, Carter, even Dan, _especially_ Dan.

"Serena snap out of it!" Blair rebuked.

"Ah. Well anyway I'll see you when you get back okay? Bye. I love you."

"Love you too S."

* * *

 **/I'm thinking to do a Chuck X Blair chapter in-between, maybe it'll be a good change in pace? Let me know if I should do one./**


	5. Into Enemy Lines XOXO

**Into Enemy Lines XOXO**

 **/A/N: Hi sorry not being able to post lately. I'll be more frequent in the coming weeks./**

* * *

The girl in the tight blue sequence dress bent strategically to blow him a kiss; Her puckered lips and wild hair lingering dangerously close to his mouth.

"Call me." It wasn't a suggestion, it was an urgent demand made with the most frank flirtations.

"I think she just hit on you." Dan noted. Nate however wasn't bothered. He got such advances on a daily basis.

Dan and Nate had met up to discuss about the upcoming interview for the Spectator and the impending storm ready to wreck their lives called Carter, but had done neither so far. Between the alcohol and anecdotes they had forgotten about it entirely, or rather wished that they would forget. Every guy was entitled a drama free night, right?

Dan had burnt his fair share of bridges with people. He wasn't a very social guy to begin with. He was still surprised he had friends. He didn't mind being a self proclaimed lonely boy, but with Vanessa far away and things between him and Serena a drift, it was nice having a pal.

Dan and Nate had always been friends it seemed. Nate was a nice guy. When they first met, he wasn't as judgemental as Chuck or possessive like Blair, he had been kind to Dan. Even when the two had been pinning after the same girl for years, they didn't harbour any hard feelings. And throughout all their fallouts, the two remained friends.

The most interaction Dan had with anyone, aside from Serena was Nate. The two had spend hours talking about Gossips Girl and how Dan managed to do it. Nate even showed him all his research and how close he was to finding out. Truthfully Dan was impressed. Nate had never been great at academics but he was smart. Dan respected all the time and effort Nate had put into his paper.

"Hold on." Nate stopped mind sentence. "Looks like I'm getting a call." he squinted at the caller ID. "From Serena."

"Go ahead." Dan took a swig of his drink.

"Hey. Nate." The voice was reluctant.

"Hi. What's the matter?" Nate caught on immediately. He could sense Serena hadn't called because she was in a chatty mood. He immediately excused myself.

Dan didn't want to admit it, but it slightly infuriated him that Serena was going to Nate with her problems. He was well aware that she it was Dan she wanted to talk to Nate about but it didn't lessen his annoyance. Out of restlessness he reached for his phone but found that it wasn't there.

 _Shit_.

"Hey sorry. Where were we?" Nate confirmed.

"Third Drink." Dan desperately want ask why she had called, what they talked about or whether she talked about him but voiced none of it. "Anyway, I should head back. I forgot my phones at home and I was expecting a call from my publisher."

"Yeah sure. We're still on for Friday though right?"

Dan responded in affirmative.

* * *

When Dan arrived in his lobby, he was half wishing to find Serena there. Sure, he was mad at her for lying about Carter but he still missed her.

But it wasn't Serena who standing here in wait. It was Blair. Out of all the people in the world is was Blair.

"Blair?" Dan called. She whipped her head in his direction and stalked towards him.

"Where's Serena?" she demanded as if he had somehow kidnapped her.

"I don't know!" Dan admitted, a hint of sadness apparent in his voice.

"How do you not know where she is?! She's your neighbour isn't she? You know what? Forget it. This was a bad idea from the start." Blair brushed past Dan.

A part of Dan felt relieved as she began walking away, but something made Dan stop her. Maybe is was the utter panic in her eyes like a deer caught in headlights or maybe it her quivering jaw but Dan felt it his duty to ask her what's was wrong.

"It's none of your business _Humpfreak_."

"Blair." Dan said calmly. "You can wait for Serena at my place."

"I don't want to see Serena!"

The two of them stood in awkward silence. Dan didn't want to probe further but Blair hadn't felt, despite her protests against staying.

"Ahem." Dan cleared his throat.

Blair didn't want to see Serena. She didn't want to see anyone, much less Dan. She didn't hate him for what he did as Gossip Girl anymore but she wasn't necessarily bffs with him either. She didn't want to take him up on his offer but it was better than being alone and lost. So terribly lost.

Once inside, the two sat quietly, sipping coffee, which Blair broke the silence to inform was 'bland and watery'.

"I thought you guys were coming back next week."

"Yeah, I thought so too. But something suddenly came up and Chuck had to take care of it." Blair noted sadly. She didn't even attempt to hide her disappointment.

"Oh. So where is Chuck?"

"New Zealand." Blair almost pouted.

As the minutes ticked by, Blair grew restless and Dan more awkward. Blair's eyes kept darting and she kept tapping her foot. It was quite unusual given that Blair Waldorf-Bass didn't have nervous ticks.

"You know what? I'm going to call Serena." Blair had no intention of sharing her woes with Serena but she really couldn't handle being stuck here in this situation.

Hurriedly she reached for her purse and managed to knock it over. She cursed herself for her lack of grace.

"Here, I'll help." Dan stooped down and began collecting the contents of her bag, one of which was a pregnancy kit. Dan wanted to ask but then realized it was none of his business.

"Give me that!" Blair order furiously.

There wasn't just one kit, there were at least four more.

"Blair, is this what you are worried about? Being pregnant?"

"Like I said. It's none of your business." Blair was hysterical now. It was impossible for Dan to ignore her. She was so scared and restless.

"Does Chuck know?"

"No. No one knows and it will stay that way. Got it Humphrey?!"

"Blair you have to tell Chuck."

"I can't." She chocked. "I can't."

"Blair-"

"No. We're finally happy, Dan! So much happened this past month, with his dad, I mean. I can't tell Chuck!"

"Blair, he loves you. He'll understand."

 _Dad I lover her. Whether she's pregnant whether she's not pregnant_... Dan pushed the thought out of his head.

"No Dan you don't get it. I'm not ready." Blair was now crying, truly crying, sobbing even. She was struggling to hold herself together. She finally admitted it to someone, she finally admitted it to herself.

She hadn't realized when Dan had put his hand around her shoulder. She didn't care if it was Dan, she needed that shoulder more than anything.

"Chuck will understand either way." Dan whispered.

But she didn't want to do that to Chuck. He lost one family member, she was sure he wasn't ready to lose another.

* * *

Carter couldn't bring himself to stop admiring the blonde girl sitting next to him. She had been staring outside the window like she always did, her head leaning against the glass.

Serena had so far been the only one who had truly been there for him, the only one who had truly understood him.

"This is me." She bit her lip. She gestured to her stop.

"I wish it wasn't." he answered, which made her giggle like a child.

"Wait!" she called. I forgot my purse!" they hadn't even made it two steps out of the car.

"Out of my way!" A girl hurried past Carter as he was waiting for Serena. Her brunette curls bouncing as she walked and her heels clicked the ground with authority.

 _Blair Waldorf?_ Carter mused. But before he could stop her she was way past hearing range.

Carter traced back to where she had come from, and found Dan staring at her retreating figure.

"What was Blair doing here?" Carter's sudden appearance startled Dan.

"What are _you_ doing here Carter?" Dan said more venomously than he should have.

"Dropping off Serena." Carter could see Dan's eyes grow cold.

"Dan? "Serena was standing beside Carter now.

Dan just looked between the two,his jaw tensed.

"Oh right, sorry. You don't want to see or hear from me ever again." Serena pressed her lips together before starting towards the elevator with Carter.

As the elevator dinged closed, something inside Dan burned.


	6. Waging Wars XOXO

**Waging Wars XOXO**

 **/A/N: Hi everyone, I hope you are enjoying the story so far. I'll try to update on Fridays./**

* * *

"They went home together?" Nate inquired.

"Yeah. I don't have a good feeling about him being so close to her." Dan answered settling into a chair.

"We're going to have to do something about this. Have you talked to Serena about it?"

"And do what? Tell her to stay away from him. How do you think that's going to turn out?"

"You have point. We'll talk about this after the interview. Sage, Rose, we're starting."

As the interview commenced, Nate took on a new persona. He was still the old him, same manner of speaking and subtle nodding but he was more sincere. His gaze was more focused, you could see him analyzing each word.

"When you first began the website, did you expect it to grow so exponentially?"

"At first no. I was certain I would get a large turn out but I didn't imagine it would be at such a large magnitude. Initially, only students from St. Judes or Constance would contribute, but over time the website became a monster. I would receive hundreds of tips daily. By the time I was out of school, the network had grown so large, it was way beyond just New York."

"I see, and that's how the website was still functioning even after you had pass out from the school."

"Yes. I would get tips from all over the country."

"fascinating. So, given the incredulous nature of events that have taken place during the run of the website, did you ever feel responsible for any of the occurrences?"

"Frankly no. Aside from Lonely Boy's action I don't feel the need to take responsibility for any other person or event. The job of the website was similar to the media. I simply aimed to deliver the news. I admit, the wordings may seem manipulative but I did not force anyone to behave they way they did. Despite what I wrote, people would do as they wished in the end."

"I see. It's come to my notice that many people have coined the website a _critique_ of the lives of Upper East Siders. Any comments?"

"I suppose it was a critique of sorts. The main motif of course, was different entirely, as I have mentioned in the last piece. But, I would have to agree, it did present a critique of Upper East Side. The stories may sound insane, like they shouldn't exist but they do and that's the interesting part."

"It does indeed present a critique much like yours books. Which brings me to my next question- will we get more perspective about you as Gossip Girl in your upcoming books?"

"Yes, absolutely. In fact my newest piece will be largely on Gossip Girl and her identity."

"When should we be expecting this new piece?"

"I am not in the position to disclose it just yet, but you will be getting news of it very soon."

* * *

"Dan. um." Nate struggled to find his words. "About the interview, I wasn't accusing you of-"

"I know. It was for the paper. And it's not like Gossip Girl was a fan favourite anyway."

"Yeah sure, I never loved the website, given it kept such close tabs on my sex life but I don't blame you for anything that happened. Those decisions were my own." he went on.

"Sure I am not a hundred percent supportive of your decision to post about me having syphilis either." He laughed.

"Hey that was all Juliet!" Dan joined.

"What are you doing after?" Nate asked.

"Nothing really. I though I might use the time to work on my new book."

"Want to hang out? I don't have much to do since Chuck is in New Zealand."

"Do you ever wonder how people with friends live? I honestly can't imagine it. "

"I have friends." Nate insisted.

"Friends your aren't sleeping with. " Dan countered, to which Nate responded with a laugh.

* * *

This was the third time they were running into each other in the lobby. Carter wondered if it was some kind of twisted fate or bad luck he had somehow acquired.

"Humphrey, Archibald." Carter addressed calmly. It gave him unwonted joy in seeing their faces twist in anger. Just his presence was enough to trigger such a response.

"Baizen." Nate replied.

"I told you to stay away from here, didn't I?" Dan asked. He did his best to hide his uneasy.

"How insecure can you possibly be Humphrey, you aren't even friends with her anymore." Carter remarked with his usual smugness."You can't lose what you never had in the first place."

"Why are you even here?" Nate interjected.

"Oh. Dan knows why." Carter smirked." His expression tells me he knows very well."

"Why do you stumble here everytime? You know you aren't welcome here." Nate chided.

"Calm it Archibald. I'm not here to see the likes of you. The person I want to see is welcoming enough." he straightened his stature." Anyway, I was just leaving. It was pleasure running into you two."

"Don't you think Serena has been a bit too welcoming of him?" Nate muttered begrudgingly.

* * *

"Nate? Hey!" Serena called as she saw him approaching."Dan." she added.

"Hi." Nate have her a hug.

"What was Carter doing here? " Before Dan could ask, Nate was already questioning Serena.

"Oh you guys met? That's great!" Both Nate and Dan looked utterly confused.

"He's back in town. And I know you guys have had a terrible history but I just thought maybe you could come to the dinner I'm hosting and make amends?" Nate wanted to flat out refuse but looking at Serena's hopeful expression he couldn't bring himself to do it.

"When is it?"

"Well I heard about Blair's early arrival and I know Chucks going to be back this Friday so, I was thinking Saturday?"

"Did you ask Chuck?"

"No. But I was hoping... " Serena gave him a sheepish smile.

"Serena no."

"Please Nate, come on!"

"Why do you want to do it so badly anyway? "

"I just don't want more bad blood between us. And Carter has tired so hard to change. I though it would be good opportunity for all of us."

"Fine but I am not guaranteeing anything."

"Yes! "Serena squealed." Oh my gosh Nate I love you! "she hugged him tightly.

Dan knew it was utterly childish to feel jealous about this, but even if Serena had said it lightly, Nate had gotten to hear what Dan had wanted to hear so desperately. And maybe it was just Dan's paranoia but he could see a hint of something lingering in Nate's eyes. He looked at her just the way he did at the Bass Brunch five years ago.

"Also, Dan I know you are mad at me but I want you to come too. This whole dinner is about making amends. I want that for us too. "

 _Make amends with Carter in the room? How was that even possible Serena? He is part of the problem here!_

But Dan didn't refuse. At least they were back on talking terms again.

* * *

 **/ Sorry about the lack of Derena moments in this one! I'll compensate in the upcoming chapters. You'll also be seeing more of Chuck! But I hope you enjoyed Nate and Dan's bromance./**


	7. Old Habits XOXO

**Waging Wars XOXO**

 **/A/N: Hi everyone, I hope you are enjoying the story so far. I'll try to update on Fridays./**

* * *

"They went home together?" Nate inquired.

"Yeah. I don't have a good feeling about him being so close to her." Dan answered settling into a chair.

"We're going to have to do something about this. Have you talked to Serena about it?"

"And do what? Tell her to stay away from him. How do you think that's going to turn out?"

"You have point. We'll talk about this after the interview. Sage, Rose, we're starting."

As the interview commenced, Nate took on a new persona. He was still the old him, same manner of speaking and subtle nodding but he was more sincere. His gaze was more focused, you could see him analyzing each word.

"When you first began the website, did you expect it to grow so exponentially?"

"At first no. I was certain I would get a large turn out but I didn't imagine it would be at such a large magnitude. Initially, only students from St. Judes or Constance would contribute, but over time the website became a monster. I would receive hundreds of tips daily. By the time I was out of school, the network had grown so large, it was way beyond just New York."

"I see, and that's how the website was still functioning even after you had pass out from the school."

"Yes. I would get tips from all over the country."

"fascinating. So, given the incredulous nature of events that have taken place during the run of the website, did you ever feel responsible for any of the occurrences?"

"Frankly no. Aside from Lonely Boy's action I don't feel the need to take responsibility for any other person or event. The job of the website was similar to the media. I simply aimed to deliver the news. I admit, the wordings may seem manipulative but I did not force anyone to behave they way they did. Despite what I wrote, people would do as they wished in the end."

"I see. It's come to my notice that many people have coined the website a _critique_ of the lives of Upper East Siders. Any comments?"

"I suppose it was a critique of sorts. The main motif of course, was different entirely, as I have mentioned in the last piece. But, I would have to agree, it did present a critique of Upper East Side. The stories may sound insane, like they shouldn't exist but they do and that's the interesting part."

"It does indeed present a critique much like yours books. Which brings me to my next question- will we get more perspective about you as Gossip Girl in your upcoming books?"

"Yes, absolutely. In fact my newest piece will be largely on Gossip Girl and her identity."

"When should we be expecting this new piece?"

"I am not in the position to disclose it just yet, but you will be getting news of it very soon."

* * *

"Dan. um." Nate struggled to find his words. "About the interview, I wasn't accusing you of-"

"I know. It was for the paper. And it's not like Gossip Girl was a fan favourite anyway."

"Yeah sure, I never loved the website, given it kept such close tabs on my sex life but I don't blame you for anything that happened. Those decisions were my own." he went on.

"Sure I am not a hundred percent supportive of your decision to post about me having syphilis either." He laughed.

"Hey that was all Juliet!" Dan joined.

"What are you doing after?" Nate asked.

"Nothing really. I though I might use the time to work on my new book."

"Want to hang out? I don't have much to do since Chuck is in New Zealand."

"Do you ever wonder how people with friends live? I honestly can't imagine it. "

"I have friends." Nate insisted.

"Friends your aren't sleeping with. " Dan countered, to which Nate responded with a laugh.

* * *

This was the third time they were running into each other in the lobby. Carter wondered if it was some kind of twisted fate or bad luck he had somehow acquired.

"Humphrey, Archibald." Carter addressed calmly. It gave him unwonted joy in seeing their faces twist in anger. Just his presence was enough to trigger such a response.

"Baizen." Nate replied.

"I told you to stay away from here, didn't I?" Dan asked. He did his best to hide his uneasy.

"How insecure can you possibly be Humphrey, you aren't even friends with her anymore." Carter remarked with his usual smugness."You can't lose what you never had in the first place."

"Why are you even here?" Nate interjected.

"Oh. Dan knows why." Carter smirked." His expression tells me he knows very well."

"Why do you stumble here everytime? You know you aren't welcome here." Nate chided.

"Calm it Archibald. I'm not here to see the likes of you. The person I want to see is welcoming enough." he straightened his stature." Anyway, I was just leaving. It was pleasure running into you two."

"Don't you think Serena has been a bit too welcoming of him?" Nate muttered begrudgingly.

* * *

"Nate? Hey!" Serena called as she saw him approaching."Dan." she added.

"Hi." Nate have her a hug.

"What was Carter doing here? " Before Dan could ask, Nate was already questioning Serena.

"Oh you guys met? That's great!" Both Nate and Dan looked utterly confused.

"He's back in town. And I know you guys have had a terrible history but I just thought maybe you could come to the dinner I'm hosting and make amends?" Nate wanted to flat out refuse but looking at Serena's hopeful expression he couldn't bring himself to do it.

"When is it?"

"Well I heard about Blair's early arrival and I know Chucks going to be back this Friday so, I was thinking Saturday?"

"Did you ask Chuck?"

"No. But I was hoping... " Serena gave him a sheepish smile.

"Serena no."

"Please Nate, come on!"

"Why do you want to do it so badly anyway? "

"I just don't want more bad blood between us. And Carter has tired so hard to change. I though it would be good opportunity for all of us."

"Fine but I am not guaranteeing anything."

"Yes! "Serena squealed." Oh my gosh Nate I love you! "she hugged him tightly.

Dan knew it was utterly childish to feel jealous about this, but even if Serena had said it lightly, Nate had gotten to hear what Dan had wanted to hear so desperately. And maybe it was just Dan's paranoia but he could see a hint of something lingering in Nate's eyes. He looked at her just the way he did at the Bass Brunch five years ago.

"Also, Dan I know you are mad at me but I want you to come too. This whole dinner is about making amends. I want that for us too. "

 _Make amends with Carter in the room? How was that even possible Serena? He is part of the problem here!_

But Dan didn't refuse. At least they were back on talking terms again.

* * *

 **/ Sorry about the lack of Derena moments in this one! I'll compensate in the upcoming chapters. You'll also be seeing more of Chuck! But I hope you enjoyed Nate and Dan's bromance./**


	8. Somebody Else XOXO

**Somebody Else XOXO**

 **/ Thank you for reading this far. I'm sorry for not sticking to schedule/**

* * *

"She still hasn't picked up her phone? I called Dorota but even she doesn't know." Serena's panicked voice came from the other end. Had it been her, it wouldn't have been such a big deal but Blair was never one to disappear without trace, not for this long anyway. Even if she hadn't told Chuck, she was sure to inform either Serena or Dorota.

"Nate and I have searched for her everywhere." Chuck paced the roomed.

"I'll go look around again." Serena didn't want to see Dan at the moment but she was left with no choice. It was unlikely he knew about Blair's whereabouts but they needed as many people they could get.

"Call me in fifteen minutes in case you find something otherwise I am going to the cops."

 _Ring ring._

Serena tried Dan's door but no answer.

 _Where could he possibly we at this unearthly hour?_

A part of her worried that he too was in some sort of trouble but then she was reminded that this wasn't the old Dan that enjoyed staying in anymore.

Serena had no idea where to start looking. Chuck has already tried all of Blair's hide-aways. She had no one to accompany her either. She never stopped trying Blair's phone though. It was now that Serena missed Gossip Girl and her instantaneous updates. It was now that she missed _Dan_ and his twisted way of trying to help them.

Serena asked Blair's army of minions but they had no clue. Serena worried that Blair might have taken an impromptu trip to France without her knowledge of it.

* * *

Chuck was on call with the NYPD when the ding of the elevator distracted him. The rhythmic clank of heels on the marble floor made him turn. As he did so he found himself starting at a light blue Ralph Lauren dress and a matching head-band.

"Thank you for you time, but my issue has been sorted."

"Your back!" Blair announced enthusiastically yet her eyes said otherwise. In the years Chuck had know her, he had caught on to her fake smiles.

"Blair. What's wrong?" He asked.

"Absolutely nothing. How was the flight?"

"Blair." This time there was authority in his voice.

"What?" She asked innocently.

"You went God-knows-where, without a word to anyone."

"Sorry I must have forgotten. Anyway I'm tried so I am going to bed now."

"Blair-" But she was already gone. Chuck's initial instincts told him to bang open the bedroom door but he fought against his judgement and instead phoned Serena and Nate letting them know he had found Blair.

* * *

Serena was relieved they had found Blair but she still couldn't sleep.

She reminded herself that Blair was safe and there was nothing to worry about- but there was. Dan still hadn't returned home.

Suddenly Serena heard noise outside. It was one a.m and her only other neighbour was Dan. She peered through the peep-whole to find Dan unblocking his door.

Something ugly poked it's head inside Serena's mind. What if Blair was with Dan. Both had arrived home nearly at the same time and had been gone for roughly the same time too. Neither was picking up their phone.

 _Could Blair do that to Chuck? Could Dan do that to me?_

 _That's right, why would Dan need to consider my feeling in this scenario?_

Despite Serena's best efforts, she could not stop the dark jealousy from brewing. She knew it was wrong, terribly wrong. She should trust her best-friend.

* * *

The doors were thick and wooden but Dan could still see light peeking though Serena's. He wonder if it was because Carter was over. The thought was enough to stir up something unimaginably dark within him.

Serena and Carter weren't dating and Carter had no business being at Serena's at this late hour. But his brain would not listen to reason. He had an urge to knock but decided against it. He wasn't _stalking_ her.

* * *

In the morning at breakfast, things were more tense than ever. Chuck held on to this anger from last night and Blair continue to evade him like a deadly plague.

"Are we not even civil enough to hold a conversation?" Chuck side eyed his wife as he ate.

"When did I say that? I wanted a conversation. I was so happy you were back but instead of being happy about it you got angry."

"Welcoming? You arrived home after disappearing for twelve hours."

"I had things to take care of! You aren't the only one with work."

"Is this about me leaving early in Austria? Are you being petty about-"

"I am not being petty about anything. You tend to overreact about everything lately." With that Blair stormed out of the apartment with a flabbergasted Chuck left starting at her retreating figure.

Blair did not intend to land up where she did. She found herself again at Dan's place.

"Why do you look so angry."

"What-angry I'm not."Dan began but realized there was no point hiding it. "Carter Baizen."

"What does he have to do with anything?"

"Haven't you heard? He's back in town and way to close to Serena. I have a bad feeling about this."

"How long?" Blair demanded. "How long has he been with her?"

"Long enough."

"What in the world is wrong with you Humphrey? Carter is never good news! What are you doing letting that guy take Serena away from us?"

Dan was taken aback form that sudden outburst.

"It's her decision." He finally answered.

"Then she's out of her mind! We need to fix this asap. I don't know what he's up to but I will find out." The old scheming Blair was back. There was a spark in her eye that made her entire face glow. Dan was both mesmerised and terrified. Even after Dan had proved his ability to execute plans of utmost complexity he was still slightly in awe of Blair hunger for a game.

Dan knew he could take down Carter. He could have done it alone but with Blair here, there was no way Carter was going to survive the fall.

Dan didn't know why he wanted Carter's defeat so badly but he had convinced himself that Carter had ulterior motives. After all, both Nate and Blair agreed with him.


	9. The Mission XoXo

**The Mission XOXO**

 **/ I promise you'll get some Derena action in the next chapter. Also, I'm extremely sorry for the poor editing. I'll be mindful of it from now onwards./**

"Blair Waldorf, oh sorry I mean _Bass._ I didn't expect to see you. Has the groom lost interest in you already?" Georgina waltzed into the apartment without so much as a knock.

"Dan you should keep the door shut, you don't know what kind of filth might enter if you don't." Blair quipped.

"Like Chuck, I've lost interest in you too. What's the next scope Dan?"

"Carter Baizen." Dan finally emerged from behind the kitchen counter.

"Carter Baizen?" Georgina asked, intrigued. "Now _this_ is going to be interesting. That guy is known for worming his way out of impossible situations. Ah. I can almost hear the battle cries. I've always wanted to go up against him."

"This leads me to believe you have nothing better to do in life." Blair remarked.

"As opposed to you, who is just lounging in some guy's apartment?" Georgina shot back.

"Guys. The target here is Carter. I just got off the phone with Nate and there seems to be something odd going on with the Baizens. Nate thinks that Carter is here to cover it up."

"Archibald is on board?" Georgina asked incredulously. "Now this is _really_ interesting."

"Alright, here is the plan. Nate is already digging around for whatever it is Carter is hiding. Georgina, you are in-charge of following him around." Blair ordered.

"And what does the leave the two of you with? Time to make out? Oh please, don't think for a second I am going to let you free load."

"I am not _freeloading._ I'm making sure Serena stays as far away from Carter as possible. And _Dumbhrey_ is going to dig up dirt from the past."

"So we're going all out, now are we?" Georgina finally cracked a full fledged smile that was so characteristic to her villainous persona.

* * *

The dinner was tomorrow and Serena hadn't even begun the preparations. She had wasted time in pointless worry about what might have happened between Blair and Dan and now she was running short of it.

If it was a party emergency, Blair was a go-to. Maybe talking to her would put Serena's mind at ease. Blair was married after all, she wasn't going to engage in an extra-martial affair.

"B! Where were you yesterday?"

"Shopping emergency. A lot happened. Anyway where are you?"

"Um. Chuck said you-"

"Forget that _motherchucker! "_

"Blair, is everything okay between you two? Did Chuck do something?"

"No. Now stop badgering me!" Blair yelled.

"Ah okay. Sorry. Maybe this is a bad time to call. Get back to me when you're free?"

Now that turned out horribly. There was only one other person who excelled as a hostess the way Blair did- her mom.

"Serena, dear how are you?"

"In a bit of an emergency." Serena said cheekily.

Her mother walked her thought all the steps of last-mintue party planning. At first, Serena panicked, hearing numerous orders from her mother in one go. Lily Van Der Woodsen liked to micromanage everything. Needless to say she expected perfection from everyone, especially Serena.

Serena was exhausted just from hearing the instructions. How was she possibly going to execute it all?

Serena spent the whole day running chores and decorating. She followed everything her mother told her to the last detail. As she worked, she wondered why she came up with the bright idea in the first place. She was sure she wasn't even going to manage getting up tomorrow, let alone entertains guests- not just guests, arch enemies.

Wanting a break she tried Blair again but she couldn't reach her. Nor could she reach any of her other friends. Serena wondered if something was wrong. It could have been that they were merely busy, but that's hardly the case in UES.

A phone call from Eric was all she needed to get her morals up. Eric, upon first hearing the guest list was shocked. He reminded her what a big mistake she was making but also how brave she was for going through with it.

* * *

"The footage is going to cost you more than just couple of grands Mr. Baizen."

"I don't think you know who you are talking to." Carter leaned in. "That video is going to be destroyed whether you have knowledge of it or not." His expression unraveled nothing.

"You can act indifferent, but we both know how important that tape is for you."

Carter scoffed. "Like I said, that video will be destroyed. Willingly or unwillingly. Now I think you know which option benefits you."

"Seventy thousand. That is my price."

"So you've chosen. I thought you were smarter than that." Carter promptly turned around and left.

 _For a guy with his reputation, Carter was a little too careless._ Sage thought to herself. She had caught the whole ordeal on camera without so much as lifting a finger.

"There you go." Sage kept her phone on Nate's table, a small smirk lingering on her lips.

"What is that?"

"A lead on the Baizen case. I overheard him taking to a guy from _The New Yorker_. Have a look. You can thank me with dinner later."

Having looked at the video Nate looked up at Sage, impressed. "We need to get our hands on that video."

* * *

It was the second day of Blair's absence. She made no attempts to contact Chuck but did keep him updated via Dorota.

He was sure this was her way of lashing out at him for leaving her on their vacation. He thought Blair, out of all people new the importance of doing business. Apparently he was wrong.

He set out to make it up to her. After all Chuck Bass was all about grand gestures.

* * *

Georgina managed to Follow Carter to a hotel where he was allegedly reported to meet a business client.

She would soon find out that the client was none other than Cliff Hardman, a well known business tycoon. The man had made a name from himself by starting out as a diamond merchant, and now was part of one of the ruling families of New York. Carter Baizen was a shipping heir. It wouldn't take a genius to put two and two together.

The conversation between the two had just began and Georgina was listening intently. The two seemed to be on excellent terms, so it was safe to assume that the deal was half way finalized.

In the middle of the meeting, Carter stopped mid-sentenced and ushered the waiter over and the next thing Georgina knew, the waiter was walking directly towards her.

"Ma'am, the gentlemen over there wanted to convey a message for you. He wishes to let you know that he is well aware of your presence and it is best you left." Georgina gave her best clueless look and continued with her drink. But by the time she could do something, Carter and his partner were long gone.

Did Carter honestly think he could lose Georgina so easily? She was successful in finding him again. This time, she made sure that he wouldn't get a whiff of her.

"Yes, Dad the deal went well." pause. "No, he hasn't even heard it, no one will... No I haven't gotten the tape yet...I know, I know..." Carter was visibly frustrated. It was rare to see anything but smugness on the man's face, and certainly very rare to see him worried. Carter was always keen to keep up his indifferent facade. He wouldn't be so blind as to give other people the chance to analyze him.

* * *

Dan stifled a yawn. His back felt stiff and his eyes droopy. Beside him on the couch sat Blair, going through her phone. Both of them had been reading Gossip Girl posts in hopes that they would find dirt on Carter. Indeed he was a shady guy but he was great at covering up his tracks. Even though Dan had spent year writing about the guy and keeping a track on him, he still felt amazed my the gossip as he reread the blog.

"He would make a great serial killer." Dan mused.

"Don't worry Humphrey, I'm pretty sure he's killed a person or two." Blair checked the time and made her routinely trip to the peep-whole. "Still here and no sign of Baizen."

"Wouldn't it be easier to just go to her place? You have been ridiculously checking the peep-whole and stalking her in the market place. She doesn't have x-ray vision, she won't figure out your... Situation" Dan waved his hand, indicating Blair's pregnancy.

"Don't question my antics!" Blair's gaze dropped to the floor. "I can't face her. We turned a new leaf this year. I wanted to be honest with her, but right now I just can't."

Dan gave her a gentle look before continuing his work.

Dan squinted at the caller ID, not being able to believe he was getting this call in the first place. "Chuck?"

"Have you seen Blair." He skipped right through the niceties.

"Ah. Um... No. Check with Serena."

"Do you think I'd be calling you if she was with Serena?"

"Good point. Sorry though, I don't know where she is." Chuck cursed under his breath before ending the call.

"You should really go and talk to Chuck."

"I don't ever recall asking for your advice." Giving him one final look she stood up. "I think we're done for the day."

Oh her way down, Blair almost had the misfortune of running into Serena, who tired to call out to her but Blair did not react. Eventually Serena realized she might have made a mistake and went about her way.

* * *

Serena, for a minute thought she saw Blair, but maybe she was wrong. The girl had given no reason to the name being called out.

"Blair!" Someone from behind yelled. But the girl Serena had mistaken for Blair did not respond. Turning around to get a glimpse of the speaker Serena found a very concerned Dan.

"Dan?" She caught his attention. Upon seeing Serena, Dan looked shocked as if he hasn't expected her to be there, which was strange since she lived in the building.

"Serena, hi."

"Was-was that Blair that stormed out just now?"

Dan took a moment to respond _. A moment too long_ , thought Serena.

"Yeah no. I thought it was her...Chuck called me telling me she had been awol so.."

"Again?" Serena looked horrified. " How did I not know?"

"Chuck couldn't reach your phone. You seem busy today." It was more than a comment. It was a latent accusation that was born out of jealousy.

"There is something off with Blair. And I have been too preoccupied with the dinner thing to even notice." Serena didn't want to neglect her best friend like she had done in the past. She had been on both the receiving and giving end of the neglect. Things could easily spiral out of control when you aren't looking and given the predatory nature of the world they lived in, Serena and Blair needed to have each others backs.

"Serena, it's okay. I'm sure she knows you're there for her."

"How could you possibly know that Dan?" Dan out of all people wouldn't make such hasty remarks. Not without president. Naturally the question was laced with suspicion and it didn't go unnoticed by Dan.

"Because, no matter how many times you two fall through, in the end you are always there for her. You didn't hesitate when she asked you to help with Bart. She trusts you. And she is bound to know that you care for her."

"I thought you didn't believe in the kinship of upper east siders anymore."

"I didn't say I don't find your melodramatic dynamics any less ridiculous. It's still pathetic how you try to destroy each other for the hell of it, time to time. But even I know what you two care a lot for each other."

The words triggered a mix of emotions. It was true, Blair and her had a lot of kinks in their relationship. They had tried to annihilate each other, more times than she cared to admit but Blair was a sister to her. They had been friends since grade school and they had become so habitual to one another they had become family. Serena cared for Blair as much as she cared for Eric.

Dan's words challenged this liaison but Serena was also aware of the fact that they were meant to comfort her.

"How are you any less different Dan? Your intentions of coming and living with me were so _pure_ either."

"I never said I was any different." Dan spoke with indifference. His gentle look had now transformed into a cold, uninviting one.

"Then what gives you the right to criticise us? I would get it if you were standing on some higher moral ground. But right now you are just one is _us,_ putting yourself on a pedestal."

 _One of us,_ had never felt like more of an insult. Dan was left thinking as Serena left.

She was right. When he wrote his book, he was an outsider exposing the shady ways of rich men covered-up by the glitz and glam. He wanted the world to see past the expensive exteriors and into the tar-like hearts of the ruling families of Manhattan. He promised himself that he would do all that it takes to make it happen.

He didn't realize that he had become the very person he was trying to expose.

Dan had always wanted to be a part of _their_ world. Not because he yearned for money or the fame that came with it. It was because he yearned for a blonde haired girl he had met when he was seventeen. All of it felt pointless now that she had escaped thought his finger tips.


	10. Cod Au Vin with a Side of BitternessXOXO

**Coq Au Vin with a side of Bitterness XOXO**

 **/A/N: Admittedly, this was a hard chapter to write because we see all the character in one place. I don't think I did justice to each of them, but hopefully the next chapter will be more true to each of their characters./**

* * *

Thanks to Lily, all that was left to do for the dinner was getting ready. Serena had picked out a pecan off-the-shoulder dress and styled her hair in her signature messy ponytail. Serena wanted Blair's approval but didn't call her seeing as how she had been rejected the previous times she had.

She still wanted to know what was wrong, so she decided to confront Blair when she arrived so that she would have no means of escape.

The first one to show up was Nate, much to Serena's relief. In this pseudo- cold war like atmosphere that had grasped Serena's social life by the collar, Nate had proven to be the only friendly face.

It was the first time that week that Serena found herself laughing. The two had fallen into a delicate equilibrium, far from the drama threatening to ensue.

The second guest to arrive was Chuck sans Blair. It certainly raised questions that weren't voiced. Both Nate and Serena were aware about Blair's transient appearances and speculated that their marriage wasn't as smooth as they wanted everyone to believe.

"This reminds me of the annual thanksgiving that Lily hosts." Nate smiled.

"It used to be her favourite holiday. Still might be. The recent ones hadn't been so great." The two boys agreed. Holidays were rarely as joyous as tv commercials would have you believe. It wasn't happy family pictures and presents it was lavish meals and a lot of pretense.

"I expected the world war to break out already." Dan entered next.

"It's more like the Battle of Troy. Just waiting for Helen." Chuck noted bitterly.

Coincidently, Blair chose that exact moment to make her appearance.

"B!" exclaimed Serena. "Your Paris awaits."

Blair looked over from person to person in order to make sense of what was going on. "What?"

"Nothing. I'll take your coat."

"Looks like we're all here." Dan noted.

"Don't you think you are forgetting our guest of honor?" Blair asked.

"He's a busy guy. I'm sure he has a lot of things to take care of. He'll get here eventually." Nate remarked. It was a simple enough comment but Dan and Blair understood what it really meant.

"I don't get the point of this dinner in the first place." Chuck didn't hide his irritation.

When Carter arrived at Serena's place, he was less than happy.

He put on a smile and greeted the party, some more bitterly than others.

As soon as Serena went out of the room, he pulled Dan aside. He masked his anger as best as he could, and with a ruinous calm he locked eyes with the writer.

"Been busy Humphrey?"

Dan shrugged.

Carter smiled. "Well, you seem to be. Let me lighten your load. Don't poke your nose where is doesn't belong."

"My nose is no where near a place it shouldn't be in."

"Having Georgina follow me, trying to buy tapes? If you can video tape me, you need to remember you aren't immune to being caught on camera footage either."

Carter could see the wheels in Dan's eyes turning.

"How do I know?" Carter continued. "Not so discrete now are we, _Gossip Girl_?"

"I wouldn't threaten me if I were you. Stealing from Chuck, conning Nate? And these were your amateur stunts. You have too many skeletons in your closet. Be careful, you don't know when they might come back to haunt you."

"What are you two talking about? Serena asked.

"Oh nothing. Just old gossip." Carter replied.

"Well, dinner is served, so come on." The two men wordlessly followed Serena to the dinning hall.

The food was exquisite but the conversation was rather dull. Serena had done her best to initiate it from time to time but didn't receive many enthusiastic responses.

Chuck stuck to monosyllabic answers. Which was him being curt. He had a lot to say to Carter, and none of it was civil. This added to his strained relationship with Blair, Chuck wanted to be anywhere but here.

He wanted to sort things out with Blair as early as possible but seeing as how she wasn't willing to even talk to him, Chuck lost his last shred of patience. Things weren't looking up for this couple.

Dan on their other end, spent the night glancing at Carter, which provided little room for holding a serious conversation with the rest of the group. Nate tried to engage once or twice, but it was more bilateral than anything.

Serena wondered if she had made a huge mistake after all. None of them were even trying to reconcile. The atmosphere had gone vile and the room grew quite.

Dan excused himself to take a call and when he returned, chaos followed.

"So Carter." He began. "I heard that you had be very close to Mr. Reynolds. Funny, I haven't heard about him in a while. How has he been?"

"My family had close relations with him but I don't keep tabs on people. I'm very civil that way."

"Civil, I'm sure. I suppose that's why you decided to murder a man." This time it was Blair.

"Murder? You two have a wild imagination don't you? Oh of course, you're a writer and you believed in a happily-ever-after marriage with Chuck."

"If what we say is so far from reality, why were you hiding those tapes? No one goes to the extent of paying in thousands unless there is a deep, dark secret hidden inside." Blair purred.

"Are you really one to be talking about a secrets Blair?" Carter shot back.

"Will someone explain to me what's going on?" Serena looked from person to person.

"I am not entirely sure but Blair and Dan seem to have an idea. I mean they have been spending an awful lot of time together." Carter paused for effect."Now I don't know authentic their coots are."

The room grew still. Serena was too confused to process anything being told to her, while Chuck seemed not to care at the moment. His anger directed at Blair has dulled any other emotion. That left Nate, who knew only one side of the story and decided it was best he didn't interfere this time around.

Seeing as no one was willing to speak, Carter who had been on the edge of his seat scooted back and chimed -"Well the cod au vin was lovely."

A phone call have Chuck an chance of escape from the Awkward excuse of an gathering. "Excuse me but I won't be staying for dinner."

Needless to say, everyone else followed suit.

* * *

"Serena."Carter paused at the doorway." About today."

"It wasn't your fault."

"It wasn't yours either so stop looking so dejected."

"It was. What made me think I could pull this off anyway."

"You made the effort. Nobody else even bothered. That, in itself is amazing Serena. _You_ are amazing." Carter could stop a ghost of a smile on Serena's face.

Was Serena right about Dan and Blair After all? She didn't want to be so paranoid but the reality was, she was more paranoid than ever.

"Blair?"

"Serena?" Blair wasn't expecting Serena out of all people to call.

"What's going on? What it it what you won't tell me?"

"What? There isn't anything to tell."

"I think I have known you long enough to know when you are lying. B, you can trust me."

"I know. I do."

"Then why won't you tell me?" There was no response from the other end." Why Blair? Do you not trust me? Or is it too dirty a secret to tell."

"Serena! I told you there isn't anything to tell. Stop examining me."

"Fine. I see how it is."

"No you don't-" That marked the end of the conversation.

* * *

Dan had been debating whether he should go to Serena or not. A phone call from Blair solved his dilemma in a matter of seconds.

Serena's door opened after three consecutive knocks."Dan?"

"What Carter said isn't true."

"Then what is?"

"I can't tell you that. It isn't my secret to tell, it's Blair's."

"I think we're done here then." The door creaked shut and Dan was left standing in the empty corridor.


	11. Letting Go XOXO

**Letting Go XOXO**

 **/Author's Note: Finally some Derena action! /**

* * *

Serena knew she should have heard Dan's explanation but she wasn't prepared for the worst case scenario. she would never be.

She couldn't trust Dan the same way she used to, not after all the times he betrayed could never go back to the way they were for them. This was Serena's wake up call to move on. To move on from Dan Humphrey once and for all.

Despite making up her mind, she still spent the day going through old gossip girl posts, mostly the ones about S and Lonely Boy. Try as she may, should could not keep the hurt at bay. Her heart ached, reliving old memories.

The kiss on the lips party, the pool hall, the masquerade ball, cotillion; it all felt like a distant dream. She didn't know why she let Dan have the effect on her for so long.

Her afternoon had been fairly quiet except a call from Carter.

"How are you holding up?"

"After last night's disaster? Better than I thought."

"Hey, let's cheer you up. Drinks with me, tonight." Carter was the perfect escape. He cared about her, and he had been there for her when no one else was. And Carter just had this quality about him that was hypnotizing, it made you forget the rest of the world.

Serena was quick to agree with Carter's offer. She didn't have to worry about what Dan thought anymore.

* * *

Dan's morning has been tensed. He hadn't gotten a start on his new piece and he still wasn't over the way things ended with Serena. To make matters worse, Blair seemed more irritated than ever. The two weren't necessarily getting along. That's how it always was. They could put aside their differences for a while but it always came back to haunt them.

"Blair, I think you should go back."

"Are you kicking me out? How dare you? I'm helping you-"

"All I am saying it that you need to come clean. I am done covering for you. Delaying the truth won't change the facts Blair."

"I'm not ready!"

"Blair. You said you _loved_ him. Isn't that what you told me?"

"Are you still holding that against me?"

"No. I am just reminding you of what you are forgetting!"

"You don't need to. I didn't ask you to coach me in social conduct."

"I'm not, I..."

"Listen Humphrey, I get it, you have spend way too much time butting into other people's lives but spear me, okay?"

"Butting in? Isn't that what you do? Isn't that what you have always done?"

"I do it because I care about them."

"How is it any different from what I am doing?"

"No. Humphrey. You do it for the fun of it. What? Your Gossip Girl blogs were because you _cared_ about us? You wrote that bullshit in your books because you _cared?"_

"And you tried to ruin Serena's chances of getting into Brown because _you_ cared? You tried to separate Chuck and Raina because you cared? You were hell bent on ruining my sister because she meant something to you?"

"Jenny asked for it. And what about you Dan? You posted that tape of me and Chuck to destroy my wedding with Louis! You are the one after Carter Baizen!"

"So are you! You agreed me help me being him down. Do you know why? Because we _both_ care about Serena."

* * *

Sage and Georgina and at a café, waiting for Nate.

"What did you two find?" He sat down between the two.

"Carter really needs that deal with Hardman." Georgina explained. " _Needs_ is a bit of an understatement. It's life or death for Mr. Baizen."

"Can you skip the dramatics and just tell us?"

"It's not as fun without it. Oh but anyway. You see, the Baizens are under a lot of debt because three months ago they went bankrupt. They've done a good job of hiding it... Till now."

"And Hardman is the big fish."Nate realized.

"Exactly, Hardman is a two way ticket. He brings in a lot of cash and he secures Carter's position in the board of trustee in a joint venture." She slid him a document.

"Bass Industries is a part of this venture." Nate skimmed through.

"I get it. That video of Carter's uncle potentially killing that man is jeopardizing the deal and their reputation. Or what's left of it." Sage added.

"But what's the link to Serena?" Blair asked who along with Dan had joined the trio.

"Money." Nate answered. "Or latest that's what I assume. Lily is also on the board of trustee, I think Carter wants to win her vote."

"Because he knew Chuck would vote him out." Blair added.

"Exactly, and he'll need some money in advance to start the project, which he doesn't have because of the Baizen's bankruptcy."

"So he wants to hustle it out of Serena"

"What do we do?" asked Blair.

"We make the best cover story."

* * *

Dan met Carter outside Serena's apartment, the next morning. Needless to say Dan wasn't particularly happy to see him, _leaving_ so early in the morning.

"You should stop coming by." Dan said.

Carter waited for him to explain.

"You see Carter we know what you are up to with Hardman and I suggest you leave Serena out of this."

"Serena has nothing to do with this." Carter clarified. "You can put your jealousy in hold because right now it's of no one's help."

Serena couldn't believe what she saw in The Spectator the next morning. A coverage on Baizen Enterprises. It went on about how the company had gone bankrupt and about the shady videotape that they had been trying to buy out.

It also featured Carter, talking about his past as a conman and whatnot.

She found that both Nate and Blair were next door at Dan's.

"Nate, why did you publish this?"

"Because it's news Serena. When will you wake up and see that Carter is trying to use you. He tired to lost time as well. "

"Use me? You mean when Chuck and Blair _framed_ him. Wow. Carter was right, you guys would never see past the old him. He hasn't asked me for money or favors or anything since he has come to New York."

"But he will." Dan countered.

"How could you possibly know that? You didn't even give him a chance. He's been trying so hard. All you could have done was waited a bit longer."

"We wanted to help you." Blair pleaded.

"Help me? Why would you want to do that? You don't consider me your friend Blair."

"Serena!" Dan followed her out. "Listen."

"Dan no. Do you realize how much damage you have caused Carter? And what for?"

"He can't be trusted."

"Dan. You could have at least tried to trust him or least tried to trust my judgement. I don't even know why you were so involved in this in the first place. I thought you wanted nothing to do with me."

"When did I ever say that?"

"Say it? You didn't need to. You hadn't been returning my calls or even bothering to talk to me and I don't even want to know what's he happening between you and Blair anymore."

"Me and Blair? Serena it's not what you think!"

"It doesn't matter Dan because even if it isn't what I am imagining, you two are still hiding something from me. And I considered you guys my friends."

"Serena." Dan whispered has he got a hold of her hand. "You need to listen."

"That's what we have been doing for so long Dan. Listening. Nothing has come out of it. We still haven't dealt with what we started out with and now we have a million more issues."

"And I am willing to sit here all night, resolving him."

"That's the problem. They shouldn't have come up in the first place. I wish you had trusted me, but you didn't. And I wish I could trust you, but I can't."

Dan desperately wanted, no _needed_ Serena to stay. He felt that if he let her go now, it would be final. It would mean letting go forever.

"Please."

"It's time we realize we aren't kids anymore."

"Serena."

"Goodbye Dan."


	12. White Flags XOXO

**White Flags XOXO**

 **/Author's Note: More of Darena and Chair in the next chapter./**

* * *

Carter didn't realize when the war had broken out or what he had done to make so many enemies.

Ironically Chuck had been the only one who hadn't turned on him, but he was going to sooner or later. If not for personal vendetta, then for business reasons. There was nothing keeping him on that board.

Hardman had been on his trail every since the article came out yesterday morning. And with Hardman leaving the sinking ship, there was no one left to help him.

His family was beyond furious, although he could not understand why. It was them who had created the problem in the first place.

"Carter?" It was Serena, with a chocolate and rum cake.

"Hi." He managed.

"I wanted to talk to you. I know you are really stressed right now with all the news going around, but I'll only take up a few minutes."

"Honestly Serena, I thought you wouldn't want to talk to me." He gave her a sad smile.

"No, Carter when I said I believed you'd changed, I meant it. And whatever this is, it isn't your fault. It wasn't your mess to clean up in the first place."

"It was my family's and like it or not I'm a part of it now."

"I'm sorry Carter."

"Why are _you_ sorry?"

"Because, it was Dan and Blair's doing. And of course Nate was in on it the whole time. They said they were trying to protect me from you and I just."

A sarcastic laugh from Carter made Serena stop. "They hate the idea of you and me so much that they went as far as destroying may family... Wow"

"Forget them, Carter."

Carter, who had been sitting with him hands folded in his lap, looked up at Serena.

"You don't know how much you just being here, helps me." He took both her hands in his and gently rubbed them with his thumb.

"Yeah, well there isn't any other place I'd rather be." Serena sat down beside him and have him a peck on the lips.

"You know I could loan you the money to start-"

"No, I told you before I wasn't going to take it. This isn't your mess."

"I could at least get my mom to-"

"It's one vote against thirteen others. It won't matter."

* * *

When Dan saw Serena next, it was with Carter. For the first time in weeks, he saw her smiling.

He would see them again, and again each time more painful. He had managed to annihilate Carter, but he didn't look defected at all.

To make matters worse, Serena and Carter had grown closer over the course of Carter's downfall. Dan couldn't understand why she wanted to help the man so much. Why she wanted to be with him so much.

It was then that his world came crashing down. He spent his time bringing down the only man who had brought Serena happiness.

She was right, he hadn't been much of a friend to her. But the truth was, he didn't want to be her friend. Years of experience has taught him that Serena and him could be lovers or they could be strangers but never friends.

After the little outburst, Dan hadn't seen Blair either, and a part of him was relieved. He felt guilty for enjoying his time with her and he also felt guilty for thinking nothing of her. It was true, they were just two extremes, never in between. Either they were comrades or they were sworn enemies.

Dan had gotten plenty on time to work on his new book, until Nate showed up.

"Carter is fish out of water." Nate announced.

"I doubt it. It looks like the guy is going to come back swinging."

"What do you mean?"

"Whatever we did was pointless. We did it to protect Serena and now she's with him and doesn't want anything to do with us. And the guy still has a look of utter smugness about him."

"He might get sponsors but he'll never make the board. It's only a short term solution to his problem. And Serena has got to realize how much a dirt-bag he is."

"That's the thing. She doesn't think of him that way. I mean, what if she is right about him? She's been happier with him and with us."

"Don't tell me you want to help the guy?"

"Trust me, he's the last guy I want to help, but if we hurt him we hurt Serena too. So I think we should just leave them be."

* * *

Blair got a taste of what she had been serving Chuck- ignorance. She hadn't seen him since the dinner, and she couldn't get a hold of him either.

She had returned home from Serena's place and found the apartment transformed. It looked something straight out of a castle. Blair has to stop and admire the handy work and decorating choices.

A single chandelier overhead cast a dim golden-esque shadow, amplified by the numerous candles. The floor was lined with red rose petals, running fine the doorway to the stairs. The balcony was open and she could smell the subtle incense.

She was sure it was Chuck's doing but he was nowhere in sight. Upon inquiring from Dorota, she found that he never came home. Now it had been two days, and the only news she got was from Nate who vaguely mentioned a bar.

Blair was aware that she was the one who pushed him away and now the dread was catching up with her.

* * *

Serena found several missed calls from Blair and a message.

"Hey, S. I need to speak with you. I know I have been a horrible friend lately, but I thought maybe you'd give me a chance to make it up to you with a spa day."

Serena was ardent not to go. She didn't want to feel hurt anymore. She had been right in her decision to move to L. A.

She had finally found some peace here with Carter, away from everyone else. Away from Dan and all the memories. If only she could leave it all behind.

"What's this?" Carter mused to himself. "What does Dan Humphrey need me for?"

"You don't have to go meet him you know."

"But I want to." Carter glanced at her sideways.

The though of the two meeting made Serena uneasy. Nothing good had ever come with their encounters. Someone usually went home with a black eye or restraining order.

Now that Carter was out with Dan, Serena decided to clean up around the place. The house was in dire need of it anyway.

As she cleared out her closet and cupboards, she found a sea of memories sprawled across her bed. The dress Serena wore to Blair's first photoshoot, the dress from her first runway. All the jewelry Blair had given to Serena in her Birthday.

She found one of Nate's shirts and Dan's muffler. Her dress from graduation and the golden dress from cotillion. Serena did her best to hold back her tears.

Why could she never leave this behind? Everytime she ran away she was pulled back in. _They_ pulled her back in.

"Hey B. What time do you want to meet?" Serena hadn't forgive Blair, nor did she make up her mind to, but she was going to Blair a chance to explain herself.

* * *

"What do you want?"

"To make up for what we did."

"You put my entire family's future at stake, I don't think you can fix this, u less you have a huge sponsor."

"No we don't. But what we have, you're going to need." Nate and Dan shared a glance, before pulling out a document.

"We have dirt on Hardman and four of his accomplices, three of which are on the Board."

"You want me to blackmail Hardman?"

"You should have problem with it. It's business after all."

"And what do you get out of it?"

"We don't. But Bass industries will. Seven percent. Like it or not this is your only option."

"Fine."


	13. When Memories Come Calling XOXO

**When Memories Come Calling XOXO**

 **/Hi, sorry for taking so long to update! I was traveling for a while. I'll be more frequent form this chapter onwards. We're reaching a conclusion soon./**

"Oh my God Blair why didn't you tell me in the first place?"

"Because I didn't want to admit it Serena. Not even to myself."

"So you went to _Dan_ out of all people?"

"It's not like I _wanted_ to confide in him. He found out the test results and I ended up having to tell him. I mean, I am not the biggest Dan Humphrey fan but he _is_ the only one with some experience with a child."

"But as your best friend I deserved to know! Which reminds me, are you even planning to tell Chuck about this?"

"Not until recently. But now I think I should."

"Oh thank God." Serena laughed.

"What about you and Carter?"

Serena grew quite. She hadn't let go of what Blair had done just yet." Blair, I trust him. And its better you don't poke your nose into this situation again."

"I already apologized for it S!" Gaining no response from Serena, Blair probed."So, you really are serious about this relationship?"

Was she serious about Carter? He was her escape from all the feelings she had been trying to bury. She liked him, she really did but there was something stopping her from moving forward from just liking-Dan.

It was nice to romanticize idea of young love but it wasn't practical. She wanted for things be to the way the used to with Dan, but that was far from happening. And no matter how many times they started over, they could never move past the initial stage.

Old habits die hard, they say. Dan was her old habit, and this habit had to go. If either of them wanted to be happy, they would have to stay clear of the other.

"I want to be." Serena finally responded. "You were right. All this time I had been fantasizing about something that was already dead. My romantic fate wasn't sealed back in the eleventh grade. I need to move on from Dan, and Carter has always been there for me."

A month ago, Blair would have been overjoyed to hearing what she did. After the little stunt Dan pulled around thanksgiving, Blair didn't want him near her or Serena ever again. She had seen Serena get hurt too many times to let him in her life again. But she wasn't happy to hear it. And it wasn't because she thought Carter was an even worse choice, which she did. It was because she had realized, along the way that whether she liked it or not, Serena and Dan were bound to end up together.

"I think it's time I buried the hatchet on this deceased dream."

* * *

When Serena wounded up at Dan's door, she was searching for something she should have found a long time ago- Closure.

"Serena?"

"I think there is something to say after all. Can I come in?"

"Yeah... Yeah sure."

Serena laughed as she saw the papers sprawled across the table top and unwashed cups lying about. The entire place smelled like pancakes and coffee.

"What's so funny?"

"Nothing. It's just, this reminds me so much of the loft."

"Places change, people don't."

"But they do." Serena replied softly, almost to herself.

"Here." Dan handed her a cup of freshly made hot chocolate. She smiled down at the cup. "I can never get enough of this."

Dan wanted to ask what Serena wanted to talk about but he never voiced it. A part of him feared the answer because he knew that he wasn't going to like what he was going to hear. Instead, he weaved through the situation lightly, careful not to disturb the delicate balance of it all.

"Yeah, you'd always make me get a thermos to the park, even though it was freezing outside."

"That's the fun of it. Besides, wasn't it you who always waited for it to snow?"

"Yeah because who likes to see mush during the winter time?"

"Alright, alright." Serena laughed. A hint of a smile still lingered when she thought about their first Christmas together.

"What are you smiling about?" asked Dan.

"Remember the time when you and Jenny hurled an eight foot Christmas tree into my suite?"

"Dexter was tough to fool, or was it Bobby?Lily had to come help us out." This made Serena laugh harder.

"It.. It was really sweet what you did at the art gallery." Dan added.

"It wasn't all me. There was Eric and Vanessa and Blair."

"No. I mean for having thought of it." Dan didn't miss the color that had reached Serena's cheeks.

"It really was an amazing day." She said finally.

"It really was." The room fell silent as the two of them relived the night of Christmas eve.

"We were so happy then." Serena spoke quietly. "What changed?"

Dan didn't have a definite answer for it, no one did. He kept looking at her saddened features with a sense of regret. There was an ache within his own heart, taking birth form nostalgia and longing.

"It seems like everytime we tackle a problem, another comes our way." He finally replied.

"I guess that's the universe telling us to stay away." Serena chocked.

Hearing Serena say it made Dan want to throw a fit. He was certain she was wrong. She had to be. No one had ever made Dan feel the way he did. No one had ever made Dan go the lengths that he did.

"The universe isn't as persistent as I am." He countered.

The utter confidence in Dan's voice diverted Serena's attention from her hands to him. Why did he have to say things like that? She had come there to find closure, not to fall from him again.

"It's completely the opposite, don't you see? Everytime we separate, we find our way back to each other. If anything-"

"Dan, stop." Serena was holding back tears now. The Dan that sat before her was so much like the younger boy. He had the same stubbornness, the same gentle stare and the same warmth. It was something not even Carter could have given her. In fact, no one could have given her the sense of belonging the way he did.

"Why?"

"Because I can't do this anymore. I chose to be with Carter. I can't. I just can't" Serena dropped her head into her open palms and Dan was next to her in a heart beat. Without a thought his hands where around her shoulders, rubbing them comfortingly.

"Why are you always so late?" She said between sobs.

"Why are you always so quick to move on? You know I would wait for you forever if you just asked."

Serena didn't reply. All she did was keep reminding herself about Carter and his kindness. Dan couldn't guarantee the sense of security Carter did.

"Carter." She said bluntly, recomposing herself. "I'm with him now. And I think it's the best for the both of us."

Dan Couldn't' deny the air of finality in Serena's statement. She wasn't there to be reassure about their rekindling romance, she was there to end it. This time for good.

Dan wanted to shake her shoulders and snap her out of it, but that idea was as foolish as thinking he could have changed her mind in the first place. She was both one-track-minded and indecisive at the same time. When it came to love, she could never settle and once she chose there was no reasoning with her.

At this point Dan didn't know who to blame- himself for not having justified himself sooner or her for wanting to opt for the safer alternative. But he couldn't blame her for trying to protect herself from heart break, from seeking refuge with Carter. Isn't it exactly what he had done with Blair- Sought refuge from his unceasing feelings for Serena?

"This." Serena took a deep breath. "This is it. This is the final goodbye Dan."

Dan didn't say anything, he just kept his eyes locked with hers.

"Thank you... For everything." the longer she spoke, the more he hurt.

"You were my first love Dan, and you always will be."

"I still lo-" Dan was stopped mid-sentence.

"Goodbye Dan."


	14. Fleeting Refuge XOXO

**Fleeting Refuge**

 **/A/N: So we are just a chapter away from the conclusion! I hope you've liked the fanfic this far./**

Left at the door to stare at the retreating figure of the woman he loved, Dan felt more conflicted than ever.

What were you supposed to do in situations like these? What were you supposed to do when your mind couldn't focus and your heart began to strangle itself? It wasn't a feeling Dan was a stranger to, but it had never been so brutal. On previous occasions Dan knew that they would be seeing each other eventually. Nothing was ever this final between the two, but this time felt like it would be the last.

Since the day he had met her, he had done everything in his power to get her. That level of determination itself took serious commitment. Just when he though they could move forward, they fell apart.

* * *

"Mr. Bass, your wife is here to see you."

Side-eyeing his assistant, Chuck glared coldly. It wasn't hard to notice his jaw clenching.

Squirming under his hostile gaze, the young assistant hesitated. "What am I supposed to tell her?"

"Nothing. Just send her away." He made a shooing gesture with his hand.

 _Is it true? Is he really like his father? He's rude, that much is true but I wouldn't have taken him for a monster. How could anyway be this cold to their newlywed wife?_ The new recruit thought to herself. But her job wasn't to question her boss' antiques, it was to see his commands through, which was precisely what she was going to do.

"He can't see me? I don't think you heard who I was. I'm Blair Bass? I don't think I need anyone's permission to see my own husband." Snapped Blair.

"Ma'am I'm extremely sorry but I am under Mr. Bass' orders not to let you into his office."

Blair smiled sarcastically at the younger girl. "That's fine. Step aside, I'll talk directly to him."

"Ma'am I can't have you do that."

"I don't care what you can and can't have me do. So step aside before you lose your job."

"Ma'am-" The girl called after an advancing Blair. She even thought to call security but didn't know if it would be the fitting thing to do.

"Who let you in?" Chuck didn't even have to check who it was. The rapid clanking on the heels gave it away.

"I let myself in." She turned towards that panicked assistant and shooed her away. "I need talk to you."

Chuck didn't bother gracing her with a reply. He continued to stare at his screen instead.

"Chuck this is important." There was an urgency in Blair's voice that caught enough of Chuck's attention.

Still not bothering to speak, he looked up at her.

* * *

"The issue with the interview is out." Nate announced as Dan opened the door.

Nate wasn't expecting the reaction he got. In fact, he got no reaction at all. It was as if Dan hadn't even registered what Nate said to him.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine. I"ll have a look at it later." Dan snapped out is his haze.

"Alright then. If you are free, we can discuss about another interview focusing just on your new release."

Nate was talking but Dan was too exhausted to consider any of it.

"I have nothing Nate."

"What?"

"I thought I had a scope on Carter but it looks like I don't. There is nothing appealing about this storyline. It's the same repetitive critique from the previous books." Dan was visibly frustrated.

"When is the deadline?"

"August. And it we decided that this time it wasn't going to be a serial publication. I can't have it done with no plotline."

"You still have time to further and improve the Baizen story." Nate noted. But Nate was aware that Dan wasn't annoyed by the lack of storyline in his book, it was something else. Seeing as how it wasn't his business to probe, Nate restrained himself from pushing for the answer.

After about half an hour of unproductive discussion, Nate was practically forced to ask Dan.

"Is everything alright with you?"

"What do you mean?"

"You seem a little out of it."

Dan paused to think about his response."Sometimes you can foresee your loss, but it doesn't mean you're prepared for it."

Nate didn't have to ask, he knew it was about Serena. The look in Dan's eyes gave it away.

"You may think it, but you are never fully ready to let go of Serena." Nate commented, remembering his own experience.

"It took me three years to get over her the first time. And even then I hadn't fully let her go."

Dan looked at Nate, and he could make out the fact that he still hadn't forgotten her. How had Dan missed it for so long? He remembered the look Nate had while looking at Serena at the Bass brunch. Now that he though about it, he realized that look hadn't ever fully vanished. Traces of it still lingered when Serena was around. A sudden surge of protectiveness came about him and he realized he had never completely gotten over her either.

"Anyway, we need to get you out of this place and we need to get you very drunk." Nate continued.

For a fleeting moment logic struck Dan and he considered refusing Nate. But the moment passes as quickly as it had come.

Cut to about forty-five minutes later, the two men were down to their third drink.

"Best part." Nate shouted over the noise." All drinks on the house. Chuck owns the place."

I don't think Chuck would have minded Nate and Dan mooching off just a tad bit.

* * *

"Why didn't you come straight to me? What were you afraid of Blair?" Chuck asked.

"Did you think I would force you to give up the kid? I am not my father." Chuck added. It was more of an assurance to himself rather than to Blair. He wanted to be anyone but his father. He loved Blair too much to force her to do something she didn't want.

"The opposite of that actually." All the confidence Blair has boasted a while back was replaced by anxiety and awkwardness.

"You feared that I would make you leo the baby against your will?" It sounded ridiculous when Chuck said it, but it was true.

"Chuck, you were in such a dark place... I didn't want to take this away from you."

"And how did keep it from me make things better? "

"Time. I needed time to decide what I wanted."

All Chuck's anger from the fight melted into something softer, more gentle and considerate.

"Blair, it doesn't matter what you chose. All that matters is you."

Blair's unease had faded too, and a smile blossomed on her cheery lips.

"Yeah well, I decided I want to keep it."

A matching smile found its way to Chuck. A full smile that finally reached his eyes.

* * *

"Blair, Honey that's wonderful!" Eleanor couldn't contain her joy when she heard her daughter's excited squeal.

"Look at that! I'm going to be a grandpa!" Cyrus chimed.

Of course Harold and Ramone were the next to find out.

"Darling that's wonderful! We'll come down to see you as soon as possible."

"We need to make room for the babè!"

* * *

The building lobby was seeing a lot of action the next morning.

A very hung-over Dan had stumbled back to his apartment, followed by Ms. Van der Woodsen, Chuck and lastly Carter.

Lily thought it was a pleasant enough day to go out and drop off some more things Serena had left the night before. So it was no surprise when she ran into Chuck, who of course was there for work seeing as how he owned the building.

"Lily." He greeted.

"Chuck, how are you?" Lily smiled affectionately.

"I'm fine. You however don't look all that well." Even without a close inspection Chuck would gather Lily wasn't well.

"Just a bit tired that's all. Oh yes, congratulations by the way. Serena told me." Lily leaned forward to hug the father-to-be. She wasn't a blood relative, but she had been the closest thing to a family Chuck had ever had. There was a strange sense of comfort in Lily's wishes, it was almost motherly.

"I think this calls for a celebration."Lily added jokingly.

Celebrations were indeed underway. It just wouldn't be Blair-eqsue if there wasn't a celebratory dinner. No one did hostess better than a Waldorf. It was only a matter of time before the invites were sent out.

Our last visitor was none other than Carter.

As he entered the apartment, he could see a storm has hit the place. There were things lying about everywhere- photos, clothes, shoes, books, you name it.

"Were you robbed by barbarians?"He asked.

"Spring cleaning." Replied Serena. But her voice didn't mirror his playfulness instead if sounded feeble and small.

Carter made a note to approach her gently. Peering into her eyes he asked,"Are you crying?"

"No... I mean yeah. It's just all these old memories." Serena didn't mention memories of whom. It was memoirs of Dan and Serena's time together that had been haunting her.

The picture of them at cotillion lay flat on the bed with tear drops scattered across the frame. The first copy of the first story Dan had published sat latent inside a folder. Her dress from her mother and Bart's wedding was thrown right in the middle of it all. What was she supposed to do with am these memories? Even without the physical reminders they were itched into her brain, forever to stay.

Every time she was near Brooklyn, it reminded her of him. Every time she heard of the Ice Capades or see a Vespa, she would think of him. How should she possibly outrun them?

"Well I know just the thing to cheer you up." Carter waited for a dramatic pause."A trip to Milan."

"A trip? Why now?"

"With this storm cooking I need to be out of the picture until my uncle can clear thing up a bit. Besides I thought it would be good for the both of us to get out mind off of things."

"I'd love to go." Serena didn't miss a heartbeat.

"See, I told you this would cheer you up."


	15. Till Time Do Us Part XOXO

**Till Time Do Us Part**

 **/Author's Note: We are just one more chapter away from the arc conclusion! But I have been reading the reviews you guys have left, and I feel like this indeed was more of a Serena x Carter fanfic rather than what it was intended to be. So, in hopes of redeeming myself, I'll continue the story after the finishing of this arc (Carter Arc) and I'll focus it around Serena and Dan rebuilding their relationship. Hopefully, I'll be able to rectify the relationship or rather lack of it thereof between the central couple./**

* * *

"I'm so happy things worked out for you B! I'll try to make it in time for the baby shower."

"Make it in time? You'll be the one throwing it." Blair replied from the other end of the line.

Serena gave a short, somewhat hollow laugh. "Got it B. I'm leaving now, so bye. I'll see you when I get back."

"Ready?" Asked Carter when she hung up the phone.

"Yeah." Serena nodded. A mini vacation was exactly what she needed. The last-minute packing had done a decent job of taking her mind off of Dan. Rest of her time was taken up by Carter, who had done an excellent job of refreshing her mood.

Serena stepped out on the curb, the color of her royal blue overcoat popping in the dull background. Her blond locks had been set loose and they fell effortlessly around her shoulders like a golden mane. She really wasn't hard to miss. So it was natural that she caught the attention of dark haired gentlemen entering the apartment building.

Dan didn't like what he saw. In front of him was Serena, with Carter in tow. Both ready for traveling with their bags being loaded in the limo.

It was an ultimatum after all. It all really was over. She was going somewhere with Carter and knowing the two of them, it was anyone's guess where they were off to or when they would be back, if ever.

Dan did his best not to run after Serena. He had to let her go. That was her wish after all.

 _With a girl like Serena you have to jump in with both feet._

 _What happened with you?_

 _I swam for a while, until I drowned._

It _did_ feel like downing. As he saw the two preparing to leave, it felt like his head was immersed in water so deep, he couldn't even see the light.

He couldn't afford to be seen by Serena. If she _had_ seen him, she had done an excellent job of ignoring him. Sparing himself more pain, he rushed inside.

Bumping into people had become a common occurence for Dan. Not just him, the VDW building lobby saw so many encounters it could double as a venue for a social event.

This time it was Chuck who had the pleasure of running into Dan.

"Watch it!" Chuck called out before looking up at Dan.

"Sorry." The two men stood a bit awkwardly in the lobby.

"I forget you live here." Chuck noted.

"So I have've been hearing. What are you doing here?"

"I own the place?" Chuck cocked an eyebrow.

"Right. I keep forgetting too."

Chuck peered behind Dan to see Serena leaving with Carter.

"No wonder you are a train wreck. If I was you I wouldn't let her leave with a guy like Baizen. Every bone in my body tells me to stay clear of the guy."

"A little too late for that." Dan answered bitterly.

"It's never too late." Chuck shrugged.

"Yeah, I prefer not to destroy relationships at the very last second."

"Is that so? It didn't seem to be the case at Blair and Louis' wedding."

"What exactly are you trying to say?" Dan didn't have the patience to deal with the guy.

"I'm saying you need a grand gesture." this caught Dan's attention.

"I dedicated an entire blog to her. I don't think you can get any grander than that."

"You'll need to if you want to turn this one around." shrugged Chuck. "Now if you'll excuse me, my time is valuable."

Dan always found it amusing to see the world though Chuck's eyes. For him, anything was possible at any given time.

Dan still didn't know what to do about Serena, but he did know what to do about his book.

* * *

It really was weird not getting updates from Gossip Girl anymore. Back then, if something happened to one of them, the rest instantly knew. But now they just had to get the news the old fashioned way.

Nate was in for a shock when he went to Chuck and Blair's apartment. He went there in search for his best mate but instead found a heap of baby related articles.

"Is there something I missed?" He asked.

"I thought Chuck already told you."

"Told we what exactly?"

"We're having a kid."

Dumbstruck, Nate just stood at his place for a while before recovering enough to congratulate her. All this was very uncomfortable for him. It seemed like everyone was advancing in life. Chuck and Blair got married and were even having a kid now. Dan's career as an author had taken a new trajectory and from what he heard from Dan, Serena had moved on to Carter. He seemed to be the only one stuck in one place. The battle with Bart Bass had set the Spectator back a bit and he had no luck whatsoever in the love department.

He was still happy for Blair and Chuck and offered to help whenever needed. He just didn't know how that would play out, since he had no experience with children.

"Since you didn't come here to congratulate me, I'm guessing you're here to see Chuck?"

"Yeah, actually I was."

"Then you're going to have to wait a bit. And since you have nothing to do at the moment why don't you help me?"

Nate chuckled. It was classic Blair. Although he had a lot of work to get done, he decided to stay and help for a while anyway.

"Everyone seems so busy these days. And without Gossip Girl, it's hard to keep up." Nate noted.

"True. But it's a relief we don't have every aspect of our lives recorded. I would like some privacy for a change."

"That's also true."

* * *

The car ride was awfully quiet. Carter finally got time to doze off. Between his family and everything going on with Hardman, it was hard for him to even find time to rest.

With Carter asleep, Serena had plenty of time to herself. She was getting further away from the city, but her mind wondered back to the apartment next door.

She reminded herself over and over, that she made the right choice. It was time they all moved on from the past.

She wouldn't allow herself to fall again, to get hurt again.

She was certain going to Milan with Carter was the right decision. She didn't know when they would be back. With Carter you could never know.

She had informed her mother, Eric and Blair. Even Nate and Chuck had gotten the word. She didn't know if Dan knew.

 _If he knew, would he have told me otherwise?_

 _No Serena, snap out of it. It's over. Nothing he could have said would have changed your decision._

This didn't stop her from wondering.

 _You run away to Spain, Up State, Boarding school, Santorini. You always come back...Where you belong._

A haunting thought crossed Serena's mind as they neared the launch pad.

 _Is this how mom felt when she left Rufus for Bart?_

At the time, marrying Bart was the wiser decision, but it didn't necessarily bring her mother happiness.

 _Was it the same when she left Rufus for the first time?_

She recalled seeing Dan's dejected face when she chose to go with Aaron instead. At the time, Aaron was the smarter choice. And she really thought she could learn to love him, but in the end she couldn't.

 _I guess I do know how mom felt._

None of this pondering mattered though. She had made her choice.

* * *

"To Milan?" Asked Dan.

"Yeah, apparently." Nate took a bite of his food. "Anyway, I think the new idea for the book will sell far better."

"Yeah. I hope so. It felt like I was hitting a dead end with the previous version."

"Plus this is a great build on to you last piece."

"Milan, out of the blue?" Dan's mind had wandered back to the subject of Serena leaving.

"That's Serena for you."

"Yeah, you're right. It's anyone's guess when she'll be back."

"I don't think it's anytime soon. Blair told me Serena was thinking of taking up modeling again. Hey man, you going to be okay?"

"Yeah. I just didn't think it would affect me this much. I guess I just always assumed she'd be back. That's how it always was."

"Things change. Slowly, but eventually things change." Nate mused to himself.

* * *

Lily never minded being alone. She had been doing it for so long. With William leaving her, and both Serena and Eric living away from home, she had made piece with her solemn lifestyle.

Along the way, she didn't realize things had changed. Maybe it was because of Rufus and the rest of the Humphrey household that stirred up her desire to be with family. Maybe it was the loss of CeCe that was getting to her. Either way, hearing the new of Serena going to Milan made her feel something. Something she didn't quite want to admit. It was a mix of longing and loneliness, one that stayed lingering around her.

She was even tempted to call up William, but decided against it. The two had mended their broken relationship, but she wasn't quite ready to jump in with both feet. She wasn't ready to drown again.

"Serena, hi."

"Mom? Hey. How are you? "

"I'm fine honey. Have you left the city yet?"

"No, another hour maybe."

"Yeah, well I just called to tell you to have a good trip." Serena froze. Her relationship with her mother had come a long way since she was young. They were closer now, more understanding of each other. But even now she didn't expect to hear her mother like this. For the first time she left that her mother was missing her. And truth be told, she was going to miss her mother too.

"I will mom. I'll call you when we land."

"Sure honey."

* * *

Chuck was on his way back home when he got the call.

Over the years, he ha acquired a distaste for hospitals and whatever news they brought.

"Yes, this is Chuck Bass." It was impossible to decipher what was being told to him, but the expression on his face was unmistakably of a man shaken to his core.

"Chuck where are you? You were supposed to be here half and hour ago?" Blair questioned.

"I won't be able to make it. I'm at the hospital."

"Hospital?"

"It's Lily."

* * *

It was around nine in the night when they reached the launch pad. And it was around five past nine when Serena got the news.

"Carter we need to go back."

"Need to go back? Where-"

"My mom, she's in the hospital. We've got to go. Right now."

"Okay, okay. Where is she right now?"

* * *

At the emergency room there was a group of people waiting. Of course there was Chuck, but along with him were Blair, Nate, Dan and Rufus.

Blair who was with Nate at the time decided she needed to be at the hospital, keep Serena posted just in case anything happened.

As for Dan and Rufus, it seemed Lily hadn't gotten around to changing her emergency contacts.

"Excuse me, we're here to see Lily van der Woodsen." Chuck informed one of the nurses. As polite the structure of the sentence may seem, the tone was anything but polite. It was demanding.

"I'm sorry. She still hasn't regained consciousness. All of you can take a seat in the waiting area. We'll inform you when she's ready to see visitors."

"What happened?" Asked Blair.

"They said there was an inflammation in her lungs." Answered Rufus. "She collapsed because of it. They had to rush her to emergency."

The five of them sat in the waiting room, anxious and worried.

Rufus tried to remain calm, but he seemed to have caught an habit of worrying about Lily. It had been more the twenty-five years and their dynamic had constantly fluctuated; the one thing that had reminded constant was the care they had for each other.

Rufus was so caught up in his fretting over Lily that he almost missed William.

"Have you heard anything from the doctors yet?" Rufus looked up to the voice questioning the lot.

"Inflammation in her lungs." Rufus answered again. He wasn't the least bothered about William being there. He

knew she would be moving on after Bart. And at the time it didn't matter who she moved on to, the only thing that mattered was Lily's well-being.

"Had anyone heard from Serena? Or Eric?" Dan inquired.

"Eric is going to be flying in tomorrow. I haven't been able to reach Serena though." Blair noted with a sense of worry.

"Try her phone again." Nate advised.

"She isn't picking up."

"How is she?!" the sudden entry of an UES It-girl never failed to turn heads. But in this instance, the stares were melancholy and sympathetic rather than envious and awe struck.

"Serena."


	16. Silent Promises XOXO

**Silent Promises**

 **/Author's Note: There you have it folks, we've reached the end of this plotline! But, in addition to carrying on the story I'll add some fluff and small story arcs to this story from time to time. I hope you enjoyed the story and thank you so much for the reviews you guys left. I really appreciated them. Don't forget to let me know what you think about the upcoming chapters and short stories that I'll be posting./**

Dan felt completely disgusted with himself, but at the same time he couldn't help but feel the way he did knowing that Serena hadn't left for Milan. This was the second time in a month that he had to witness her almost leave behind her life.

He distracted himself from his disturbed train of thoughts. The foremost order of business was Lily's health. It was also the reason Serena was there, and Dan knew that as soon as her mother recovered, there was nothing stopping Serena from going away.

The corrosive feeling kept bubbling inside of Dan. He left a certain kind of relief with the way things had played out but he was also worried about Lily.

She was his acquaintance, briefly his mother and largely a family member. The two had engaged in a lot of banter over the years, but that had also been a foundation for the bond that had cemented between them over the years.

This dynamic with Lily extended to everyone in the waiting room. They all had rocky relationships with her, but each valued her for who she was. Her sudden ill health had shocked everyone, a grieving daughter in particular.

Serena stood in the room, tear streaked and panicked.

Unable to think clearly, let alone process the information, she latched on to a blue sleeve to stable herself.

Looking up at a familiar set of soft brown eyes, she asked. " What did they say? Will she be okay?"

Dan secured his hand around her shoulder and held her firmly, knowing she needed the support.

"We don't know yet." He replied honestly. "But I think you should sit down first. It might be a while before they get back to us." he guided her towards an empty bench but she just shook her head.

She nibbled on her fingers nails as she waited for a verdict but none came her way. Finally caving into her anxiousness, she buried her head into Dan's shoulder, not knowing what else to do.

Dan had always been warm. Whenever she felt the shiver of the Manhattan cold, she always remembered a peculiar warmth and the smell of coffee. It wasn't the his body temperature, it was the way his eyes seemed warm, it was the way his hands instantly flew to her side, it was the way she felt safe in his embrace. She couldn't get this kind of security anywhere else. Not even with Blair and certainly not with Carter.

Of course, Serena was too worried to pay attention to her actions. She hadn't even realized that it was Dan she latched on to when it was Carter she chose to be with. At the moment it didn't even matter. All that mattered was her mother's safety.

Admittedly, she didn't initially have a good relationship with her mother. Whether it was her rebellious behavior or her mother's totalitarian antiques, the two didn't get along. But now, after everything that has happened, the two had managed to overcome their differences. CeCe's death left both of them fragile and holding on to their bond.

* * *

Serena might not have noticed but Carter certainly did. He felt his fists clench and unclench. But he was in no position to do anything about it.

This wasn't a high-school love triangle, it was a serious medical situation.

As the seconds ticked by, the anger intensified because beneath it, Carter's insecurities grew.

It didn't matter who Serena had chosen, she had a tendency to run back to Humphrey. She would never truly be his and the thought swirled a whirlpool of emotions within him.

* * *

"Ms. van der Woodsen is awake now, she is ready to take visitors."

William was first to step up but was instantly stopped by Rufus.

"What?" demanded William but Rufus only tilted his head towards Serena.

"Mom" Serena exclaimed quietly from the doorway. "How are you?"

"A little drowsy, but overall okay." Lily was more than delighted to see her daughter. "I thought you left."

Serena shook her head in response, still crying. "Not with you like this. Why didn't you tell me about this beforehand?"

"I didn't think it would be this serious." Admitted Lily.

The two sat and talked, about the most trivial of things. Serena didn't want to leave her mother, not when she looked so frail.

Their conversation only stopped when Chuck entered. Knowing that Serena had already taken up more than her fair share of time with Lily she motioned Chuck in.

* * *

Chuck wasn't as talkative as Serena was, in fact Chuck wasn't really a man of words at all.

"Ah, Charles. So good to see you."

"You know, I am really starting to despise hospitals." he took up the spot that Serena left vacant.

The conversation didn't progress any further, but a lot was said in the silence that remained.

Chuck had only opened up to so many people, and Lily was one of the reasons he did so in the first place. She was his only real parent figure, the only one that guided him in the right direction.

Lily on the other hand was happy knowing that despite not starting out as a model parent, all her kids had grown up to be good people. They weren't without their flaws, but they were good people.

"Lily?" Blair knocked on the door with Dan by their side. " How are you feeling?"

"Much better, thank you Blair."

"Sorry to interrupt but Eric is on the phone and he has been waiting for a while now."

Dan handed Lily the phone, with a frantic Eric mumbling form the other end.

"Eric, I'm fine." her son's face relaxed upon seeing his mother. " Although all these flowers are a bit overwhelming."

"Trust me, I know." laughed Eric.

* * *

Rufus was the last to visit. The ordeal didn't last more than ten minutes but it was rather comforting for the two.

Maybe not lovers, but they were certainly family.

Nothing ever missed Blair's eye. amidst all the worry and panic, Serena's comfort and Carter's lack of it, caught her attention.

She promised Serena she would let go of the matter, but she was going to have to make an exception after seeing what she did.

She was never a fan of Baizen, and the fact that he was taking Serena away from her when she needed her most didn't make her hate him any less.

"Carter, if you don't mind, I'm going to stay here for the night."

" Ah, I need to talk to you about that." Carter pulled Serena to the corner, out of everyone else's earshot.

"Serena, look I know you are worried about your mother but I need to get out of here now."

"I can't leave her now."

"I am not asking you to. Listen, I've delayed out departure till tomorrow afternoon but I won't be able to delay it any further."

Serena nodded but she hadn't registered his words, not even in the slightest.

"I need to go make arrangements, I'll come pick you up. Just give me a call okay?"

"Okay."

* * *

Lily was asleep once again and it was time for everyone to leave but both Serena and Chuck insisted on staying. There wasn't much need for anyone else to. But Blair decided to the two needed some moral support.

Seeing as how Blair was volunteering to stay, he wasn't really required. But he decided to anyway. She couldn't leave Serena in the state she was and no was objected to him being there.

It was nine in the afternoon and by now both Chuck and Blair has left.

Serena, who was completely exhausted was fast asleep on Dan's shoulder. Unbeknown to her, Dan's jacket was warped around her like a blanket.

"What time is it?" Serena mumbled under her breath.

"Oh earth to sleeping beauty. It's five past nine."Surprised to hear Dan's voice she stirred out of her sleepy haze.

"Morning." He greeted.

She tugged his jacket of of her and draped around his shoulder. "Morning."

"I'm going to get coffee. Want anything?"

"One for me too, please."

With the hot cup warming up her fingers, she looked sideways at Dan. "Thank you, Dan."

"It's no problem."

"No really, thank you for today, I wouldn't know what to do without you. Thank you for always coming to my rescue when I need you."

Caught off guard, Dan couldn't think of a response. "It's really no problem. Isn't that what friends do, be there for each other? Did Fred Flintstone ever give up on Barney?-"

"You never did got rid of your mumbling." Serena have a short laugh.

"Old habits die hard." He smiled.

"Ms. van der Woodsen?" a nurse came calling.

"Yes, that would be me."

"The doctor would like to have a word with you."

Gregory Heist, as the name tag read, was the doctor in-charge of Lily's treatment.

"She has pneumonia and it seems like it's already been a day or two since the onset. The good thing is, the antibiotics are working well so, another two- three days of complete bed rest and a week's treatment will have her well and healthy again."

"Serena, I really think you should go home and get some rest now." Dan tried to cajole, but Serena shook her head.

"Not until Eric gets here."

"You look like you are about to pass out. You need more than just coffee in your system."

"I said I'm fine." her stomach didn't quite agree with her. Her was famished and her stomach decided to growl in protest.

"Are you sure about that?" Dan tried to hide his smile.

Both annoyed and embarrassed, she agreed to eat whatever Dan decided to bring.

Soft pretzels and shakes were the only thing Dan could find on such a short notice, so they would have to suffice.

"Mmh." Serena tool a bite into her pretzel while Dan watched in amusement.

"This is literally the best pretzel I have ever had! Gah Dan I love you!" Serena squeaked. But as soon as the words were out both of them froze.

You could argue that the words were nothing but platonic, but there was nothing platonic about the easy with which Serena uttered them. It felt so natural that it surprised even her. When she said it to Carter, it was like make-believe. She was trying to convince him and herself that she loved him but nothing had ever felt so forced. She hadn't even realized it until that very moment.

Clearing his throat, Dan joked. "Dan Humphrey to the rescue."

Glancing at her phone she could see her call log has blown up. With a jolt she realized it was already eleven. She was supposed to leave in a other hour.

"Let me guess, Carter?" Asked Dan.

"Why do all our family reunions have to be at hospitals?" Asked Eric. The younger boy entered, backpack in hand. He hadn't even bothered to drop off the luggage.

"Eric!" exclaimed Serena as she pulled him into a hug.

"Hey Serena. How's mom doing?"

"She's fine now."

* * *

Serena sat in the waiting room and Eric talked to their mom. With him there, she had no reason to stay. She should have left to meet Carter but she didn't budge. She didn't want to.

Instead she sat wordlessly with her head on Dan's shoulder. "Shouldn't you be going home now?" She whispered.

"Well, we're headed the same way, why not go together?"

"I... I'm not."she mumbled. This was exactly what Dan feared she would say.

He knew there was no way he could prevent her from leaving, so he chose to stretch out this moment as long as he could.

At half past eleven, she phone really did begin to blow up.

"Serena, are you coming or not?"

"Carter?" Asked Dan in the background.

"Yeah. I'm coming."she told him but in all honesty, she didn't want to leave.

She didn't know why but she kept wanting to think of an excuse to stay. Every bone in her body want to stay in New York where everyone she cared about were. She knew, she would never get a sense of belonging anywhere but here.

* * *

At the door the two stood facing each other.

"Have a safe trip." _Please don't go._

"Thank you." _Please don't let me go._

"You're late."informed Carter.

"I know. I'm sorry. It's just my mom and I had to clean up and everything-"

"Was that Dan I heard on the phone."

Serena gulped. She has never seen Carter so mad.

Carter repeated the question, angrier this time.

"Yes." she admitted timidly.

"I am just going to ask you one question." it took every ounce of strength Carter had not to yell at her.

"Do you still love him?"

"What kind of question is that Carter?!" Serena replied, equally angry.

"Serena, I saw you at the hospital." He took in a breath to compose himself. "Just tell me if you still love him. Because of you do, I don't think we can work."

Serena took a while to take in everything Carter had been telling her. She felt a surge of angry and fear and worst of all, she left herself hesitate.

"Answer me Serena."

"I..." a tear rolled down her cheek.

"It's a simple question."

Did she still love Dan?

"No." she cried.

"Serena."Carter's voice dropped to a whisper. The quietness on his voice was a hundred times more frightening and certainly a lot more haunting than his screams could ever be. "I can see it in your eyes, you do. You still do."

"Carter." she cried as he turned around to leave.

"I want to be wrong Serena. I want more than anything to be arising about this." and with that, he was gone.

* * *

Serena was a whirlpool of emotions. She was scared, confused but majorly she was angry. Angry at herself for not being able to convince Carter, for still having feelings for Dan.

But the omg person she was most mad at was Dan. Why did he always have to waltz back I to her life when she had made it clear she wanted nothing more to do with him?

Without a thought, for the second time that month Serena found herself banging on Dan's door.

"Serena?" the sight of her was almost like witnessing Santa's sleigh fly through the winter sky.

"Why?" She asked in a deadly whisper. "Why won't you let me move on?"

"What do you mean?" By now Serena was inside and the door had been shut.

"Carter. He's at the airport leaving... Without me. Do you know why? She still think I am in love with you."

Dan didn't know how to respond to that. "Serena. Can you really look me in the he and tell me that there's nothing between us?"

"Dan, we agreed to end things. I told you I am moving on, there is no point even discussing this!"

"Serena you can keep denying that you have feelings for me but you can't deny what happened at the hospital."

"I was scared Dan! My mother was in the hospital, I wasn't thinking straight." Deep down, however, she knew why she latched on to Dan instead of Carter. She had always known. But she had been down this path too many times. Her heart had been trodden upon time after time that she wasn't sure there was a piece left to crush and Dan had proved that this time was no different- the lying and fighting, it was all too much for both of them.

"Then why are you here? Shouldn't you be going after Carter right now?"

Serena froze. Dan was right, if she really had been in love with Carter she would be at the airport, proving to him that he was the one she loved, not Dan. But here she was, in Dan's apartment, an emotional mess of a being.

"I'll tell you why Serena. You don't love him, not the same way he loves you." Dan took a step forward so that he was merely inches away from her. " You don't love him." He repeated. "Not the way _I_ love you." he tipped her chin forward so that she had no choice but the face him.

Her blue eyes where listless, searching for something without knowing what they were searching for. Her face was tear stricken and her hair were a mess from last night. Her lips were now chapped and drawn together, but even now she was beautiful. So beautiful it hurt.

Seeing as Serena hadn't uttered a word, Dan continued, never once breaking eye contact.

"Serena Celia van der Woodsen." Serena stilled, her eyes focused solely on him. _"I love you, always have always will."_

Dan could feel Serena's sudden intake of breath. "Everytime I have told you that I loved you I have meant it. The first I said it, before you were leaving for LA and everytime in-between, I have meant it. I'll always mean it."

Serena felt like her world had been flipped upside down and everything was hurling towards her in fast-forward, only Dan's words felt like they were in slow motion. She just wanted a moment to process things but Dan wouldn't keep quite.

"I know I shouldn't have meddled with you and Carter, but like Chuck said I need to make grand gestures. I can't keep letting you drift away from me. I won't let you do that anymore. Not for some other guy. Not again." Dan couldn't stop himself from rambling but he felt the need to tell it to her as it was.

"I know I hurt you. I published the article knowing that it would hurt you. I wrote about you on Gossip Girl knowing there were going to be consequences but that was my integrity as a writer, me being truthful to my work, that doesn't mean I don't love last thing I want to do is see you hurt.

Serena, somethings you can't move on from. I can never move on from you. I've tried, with Vanessa and Blair and-" he stopped to take a breath. "None of them made me feel they way you do. It's because they _weren't you_."

"Dan st-"

"I guess what I am trying to say is, you are the one. You have always been the one. Remember how we agreed we only have one shot? I want to take it because I can't imagine being with anyone else-"

Dan stopped mid-sentence as his lips locked with Serena's. Closing his eyes, he forgot all about what he was saying and drowned in her scent and the feel of her soft curls between his fingers.

"Finally, it's time you shut up." she gave him half a smile when she drew away from him. Dan was visibly upset about breaking the kiss.

"I love you." Serena didn't have a way with words the way Dan did, but these three felt urgent and they felt right.

Something within Dan relaxed. Throughout his whole speech he had felt an uneasy tension that liberated at the sound of Serena's voice.

"I wish I had said it-"

"Shh. Enough already." Serena had a finger over his mouth.

"Yeah." Dan attempted to speak but it came out mumbled.

Taking the hand with the figure to lips, into his own, he used the other to gently caress Serena's cheek. She smiled up at him and it was as if they stood there and time stilled.

"Dan." Serena finally spoke." I better go check up on Eric and my mom."

Kissing her forehead Dan walked her down to the car." Should I come with?"

"Only if you want to." Dan nodded in response before settling in the seat beside her.

Sitting in the car with Dan, with her head leaning against the window and her hand in his Serena knew that this was where she belonged.


	17. Reunion XOXO

**Reunion XOXO**

 **/This chapter onwards the new arc begins, sans Carter. Hopefully as this continues, we see the DS relationship progress./**

* * *

"For once," Eric exclaimed. "Can we have a normal holiday?"

"Nope." Replied Serena, who was busy looking over restaurant menus. "What do you want to eat, mom?"

"Anything is fine really."

"I don't think we have the liberty to chose. It's Christmas, the only places that are open are either Chinese take-outs or the black market." Eric reminded.

It was the second day after Lily's release from the hospital and the entire family had completely overlooked the fact that it was Christmas.

The doorbell dinged and Eric was on his feet. "This better be a Christmas day miracle."

"Hello, Eric." William smiled and Eric did his best not to flinch.

Eric had made peace with his father's depart a long time ago, and he didn't appreciate the unannounced re-entry.

Ever since William had returned to their lives, Eric tired to be on his best behavior. For some reason his father's presence was helping console his mother.

This time around Serena was on his side as well. She didn't protest against William seeing Lily again but wasn't in favor of it either. Together, they all pretended that they were a family again.

"And look, I've got dinner."

"Thanks Will-dad." Eric corrected himself.

William and Lily engaged in conversation while Serena excused herself to take a call.

"Hey B, Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas S. How's the dinner going?"

"Oh, well we were on the verge of going to bed hungry but fortunately William showed up."

"William? Are you sure you can trust- oh wait that's right, I need to stay out of your personal matters."

"About that, I am so sorry I went ballistic on you with the whole Carter incident. I know you guys just wanted me to be safe. I get it. I feel like such a jerk."

"All is forgiven...if we're still on for Sunday." It had been forever since the two hung out on a Sunday morning, having croissants and cappuccinos while watching Breakfast at Tiffany's.

"You got it B."

"Anyway, how are you feeling about William coming back?"

"It's weird B. He had been so horrible to us in the past and now mom wants to pretend that nothing happened."

"What are you planning to do about it?"

"Nothing. I think mom just doesn't want to be alone and she has no one left besides the two of us... And dad." the word left a distaste in Serena's mouth. "You know three years ago, I wanted nothing more than to be a family again but this just feels unnatural."

"It's going to be okay S."

"I know. Besides I have you guys."

* * *

If you put all the drama with Ivy behind, it was almost a normal Humphrey Christmas. Even Jenny made an appearance, however short it may have been.

"It's time for the big event. So Jen, as our guest of honor, you get to decide who the better cook is among the Humphrey men."

"Dan, it saddens me that even with your negligible amount of effort, the award goes to dad!"

"What's prize, if I may ask."

"The honorary duty of cleaning the dishes." quipped Dan.

"Not much of an award, son."

Both Dan and Jenny had grown up and grown rather detached from their home, but on Christmas day they were a family again.

The buzz of Dan's phone abruptly stopped the conversation.

"I thought we had a policy of no phones while having dinner?"

"Yeah, but we're done eating so that technically doesn't apply. "After the second ring, Dan decided to pick it up anyway.

"Merry Christmas." The voice instantly brought a smile to Dan's face.

"Merry Christmas, Serena. So to what do I owe this pleasure?"

"An extremely awkward family dinner. I know it's juvenile, but Eric excused himself and I didn't want to be alone at the table with mom and William."

"Running away from awkward dinner is exactly what adults do." Dan managed to earn a laugh from Serena.

"I also called because." Serena paused. "Go look outside your window."

Finding the nearest window in the loft, Dan peered outside. The entire city of covered with sheets of white.

"It's snowing." She finished.

"Yeah."

* * *

The van der Woodsens sat in front of the fire place, all snuggled against Lily.

With William gone, the slight tension had vanished completely.

"Go ahead, open it." Serena urged.

"What? No!" Eric whined. He held up the Miami Dolphins' Jersey for his mother to see. "You've got to be kidding me."

"Don't worry, there's one more thing in that bag." Serena replied laughing.

And sure enough, there was a watch at the bottom.

"Thank god." Eric shook his head.

With that, the gift opening ceremony had come to a successful end; or so Serena thought.

The next day, after the Christmas festivities were over, Serena returned to the VWD building. There was a large Christmas tree at the corner of the lobby, that gave a rather homely feeling to the otherwise unfriendly place.

"Serena." Dan entered behind her. "Back from your mom's place?"

"Yeah. You coming from the loft?"

"Actually... No." he held up his shopping bags to prove his point.

"Big shopping day?"

"You could say." He smiled. Serena stopped trying to decipher what was behind his cryptic responses but came up empty handed.

"Well anyway, do you have time to stop by? I still have to give you your gift."

"I think you already did."

"Huh?" she asked, utterly confused. Unless she had been completely stoned for the past twenty four hours, she would remember having given his gift.

"The snow." He elaborated.

"I'm not mother nature." she laughed. "I didn't make it happen."

"You informed me and that counts." Serena laughed at the simple absurdity of the whole situation.

"Well then I have to give you the second present."

The two was so engrossed a in talking they didn't realize that had reached their floor.

"Oh my God!" exclaimed Serena and then burst into uncontrollable laughter.

"Is that a seven foot Christmas tree in out corridor?" She asked between laughs.

"Yeah, that's your Christmas gift. I wanted to settle it into your apartment but that would require me breaking in, I wasn't sure whether you'd appreciate that very much."

"You're amazing. This is... Absolutely amazing."

"And stupid." added Dan. "Because now I need help to get it into your apartment."

 **/ I know this chapter doesn't deal with the issues still prevalent from the last arc, but I thought I needed to give these two a break after everything I made them go through. /**


	18. Under the Mistletoe XOXO

**Under the Mistletoe XOXO**

Both Serena and Dan sunk into Serena's couch, completely exhausted after having lugged an eight-foot coniferous tree into her apartment.

"It doesn't look at all captivating." Dan slightly shook his head. "I feel bad for it. All the other Christmas trees will make fun of it for being so plain."

"Dan. Christmas was yesterday."

"Yeah but how will I give you your presents if I don't have a tree to keep them under?"

Dan picked up his bags and shook them. The sound of small objects being spewed about was heard and Serena smiled.

"You're kidding?" Dan shook his head sincerely.

Dan handed Serena one of the bags and motioned her over to the tree, that sat rather downcast in the corner of the living room.

"This is going to take time." Serena mused.

"I've got all day."

Dan picked up the red ornamental balls and began placing them diagonally down the tree, forming somewhat a spiral. From the other end, perpendicular to the red balls, he tried the golden balls so that the two swirls criss-crossed.

Serena, on the other hand, took the tiny bells and candy canes and hung them arbitrarily. She filled the empathy spaces with silvery snowflakes.

Carefully, the two began to wrap the tinsel garland around the tree. Dan held up the long length of the garland and Serena went around the tree, looping it over and under the other baubles. Each round, she would duck under Dan's arm, to which Dan eventually remarked.

"How convenient would it be if there was a mistletoe over my head right now."

"Huh-uh" Serena shook the index finger of her free hand. "You're not going to get one that easily."

Reaching the bottom of the tree, Serena tucked the Garland into place. By this time Dan already had a Christmas lights dangling from the palm of his hands.

This time it was Serena's turn to hold up the lights as Dan went around overlapping the Garland with the lights. On his final turn, he looked at her and smirked. "Still a no on that mistletoe?"

Laughing Serena reached into the bag and pulled out the Star. "Who's going to do the honors?"

Dan dragged a chair beneath the tree, and replied, as charmingly as possible. "M'lady?"

Taking his extended hand Serena walked with mocking poise. She set the star atop the tree and with the flick of a switch the whole room was illuminated. It still couldn't measure up to the radiance of the Serena's features as she marveled at their creation.

Serena beamed exuberantly, relishing in the homely festive feeling of the room. "So this is what holidays are supposed to feel like?"

"Essentially." Dan answered.

"In that case holidays aren't as bad as I've made them out to be." There was only a handful of holidays Serena actually recalled, and even among those it was hard to find one she really enjoyed. Holidays meant lavish parties and social gatherings. They meant cold wars and facades.

"They aren't all that great. There's the long lines and heavy traffic. Pesky relatives are the worst. And you think the poor have it bad; even the rich aren't spared, the social protocol and keeping up pretenses-"

"Yeah, I get it." What brought Serena joy was the fact that Dan had helped her escape her suffocating lifestyle; just the way he used to do. But even this evasion was short lived.

The dynamic certainly had changed. Dan could no longer be her sweet escape from the buzzing life of UES, he had long become a part of the world. And once you were in, there was no going back.

"I just killed the mood there didn't I?" Dan bit his lip sheepishly. "But I can more than make up for it. Settle around kids, it's presents time."

Serena clapped her hands, mimicking the reaction of a small child. "Oh goody."

Having placed the presents under the tree, the two sat down on the carpet with a blanket over the legs.

"Would it be too much if I dressed up as Santa?"

"Just a tad." Serena laughed. "Alright you go first."

Dan unwrapped the mint green and white wrapping paper and regarded the pinkish box curiously. Serena bit her lip in anticipation of his reaction. "Open it."

"Here goes." Dan lifted the lip, and inside the light pink box, sat a turquoise colored typewriter, without a top. Dan slip it out of the box, only to find a USB port in the side. He regarded his gift in utter awe.

"It's a typewriter styled keyboard." Serena was trying hard to hold back her own excitement over his amazed reaction. "I got the idea when I saw a typewriter that was kept as decoration in a café and I couldn't help but imagine you and I thought it would be just perfect. Do you like it? Is it too weird? It doesn't serve much purpose but it's so aesthetically pleasing-" Serena mouth was met by a quick brush of Dan's lips.

"Thank you." Serena could feel Dan's lips move against hers.

"Okay, your turn." Dan pulled back, much to his own disappointment.

"So, the giant timber lumbering in my living room wasn't enough?"

"I had to guarantee my chances of getting laid tonight." Dan shrugged.

"Oh and trees are the way to go? Very sexy Dan."

"What can I say? I find foliage and bark rather _titillating."_

"You have successfully outmatched Chuck Bass in the area of weird fetishes." Serena feigned shivering.

"I don't think I've reached that level yet. Anyway, do you ever plan on opening the present?"

"Alright, alright." She jokingly rolled her eyes at him. Under the tree, sat a palm sized box, nearly wrapped in golden, fastened with a writhe bow. Serena unwrapped it carefully, and slide out the red velvet case from inside.

There was a lumb in Serena's throat, the apprehension of it made her chest tighten. She almost didn't want to open it. But one look at Dan was enough to convince her otherwise.

Dan had rolled his lower lip rolled under his upper lip, his eyebrows lightly elevated and eyes beaming.

"Oh my God." Serena smiled, holding back a flood of tears.

"It looks like the one I saw Cece wearing, the last time that I saw her." Dan explained.

Serena lifted the broach and inspected it. It had an emerald stone wedged into a silver frame that had been carved to perfection. Serena recalled the one her grandmother used to wear.

"Thank you." Serena sat there, looking at the broach, recollecting memories of Cece. Even after the events of the debut ant ball, Cece has been one of Serena favorite people. She had always been there for Serena, always laughing. Although fiercely loyal to her socialite roots, Cece had come through for Serena, and it meant the world to her.

"Oh, and one more thing." Dan stood out promptly.

"Three presents? Now I think this is becoming boarderline obsessive." Serena laughed.

"No, no this one's for me."

"You're giving yourself a present?"

"Somewhat." Dan perched himself on the couch, and proceeded to hang a mistletoe such that is hung over the two.

"I see." Serena smiled and wrapped her hands around Dan has he climbed down.

"Merry Christmas."She whispered in his ear before kissing him.

The two lay on the couch for a while, snuggled against each other, kissing softly.

"Um. What was the buzzing?" Asked Serena.

Pulling the vibrating phone form beneath her, Dan answered "Might be your phone."

The caller ID read Eric's name.

"Shoot. I'm supposed to see mom." Serena gave Dan a swift kiss on the cheek before heading out.

As Serena sat in the cab, she realized that almost the whole day had gone by and she hadn't thought about anything but Dan and the tree.

It was clear now, Dan didn't have to belong to a different world to be her sweet escape; being with him was a getaway on its own. This would hold true regardless of how much Dan changed.

 **/Author's note: I'm sorry for the long hiatus. I won't be able to update as often as I use to, but I will try to at least once it twice in two weeks./**


End file.
